Life As We Know It 121-125

Life as we know it
Insert 121

Me:” uhm well may I ask why?”
Police 2:” we are investigating a case against your fiancée”
Me:” against Eugene? What case?” so apart from all my other hidden talents….acting was also one of them
Police 1:” yes Mr Eugene Sobukwe has been arrested for assault with the intention to cause serious bodily harm”
Me:” now I am really confused…Eugene hurt someone?”
Police 1:” yes he did and we need your statement to verify what he told us about the events of today…so what have you been up to?” they both looked at me and waited
Me:” uhm ok…well he went to work in the morning and I did my house chores and then went to town where I had lunch with my two old colleagues. I came back home and started cooking. He then walked in and went to the shower…when I was done we ate…that’s when I told him that I wanna visit my family in Venda…well he wasn’t too happy because he reckoned I should have told him a bit sooner as he wanted to go with me…he thought that maybe I just didn’t want him to meet my family. He stomped out of the house. A while later I drove to his work as he was not picking up my calls, he wasn’t there so I drove to his house in Monte Vista. i found him there…he was drinking when I arrived and we had a little bit of argument again. I tried to get him to come home with me but he refused so I came back here. He followed me a while later saying that he wanted to collect his work laptop,  I then took a shower, watched TV and now I was about to sleep”
See? Lying to the Police was not even hard…I guess if you have to do something for someone that you love it becomes a walk in the park. Lying to these two officers was the easiest task I’ve done all day. I know that it was not a good thing but the undeniable truth was that I loved Eugene and even though things were a little bit blur at the moment…I didn’t want to hurt him anymore than I already have
Police 1:” do you know anyone by the name Jonas Mabunda?” I frowned at them
Me:” nooo I don’t know anyone by that name”
Police 1:” how many hours did Eugene spend by himself in the house”
Me:” I don’t think it was even an hour….because I followed after him to work and then to the house” the Officers looked at each other
Police 2:” he couldn’t have done everything that Mr Mabunda said and then clean up the house as well…it’s not possible”
Me:” ok guys what’s happening here?  And who is this Mr Mabunda?”
Police:” ma’am thanks for your statement ok?” I nodded with a worried look on my face. The officers said their goodbyes and I walked them out of the door. They drove off and after that I took a sigh of relief, that was so damn easy. So I lied for him, I protected him….i guess this is what was expected of me.

The following morning I woke up and took a shower. I had to get dressed in something nice…I was going to see Eugene. That was the only thing I had on my mind. I got dressed in some blue faded skinny’s, I took out one of the heel I bought yesterday. I smiled as soon as I took the shoe out. Being a woman and all…high heels have that effect on me. I wore my simple purple top that went well with the skinny. I then wore my high heels and couldn’t stop looking at myself in the mirror and smiling. I applied some make-up and put on my purple lipstick which matched with the top and the shoes I was wearing. I combed my hair neatly and tied them up. Now that I was thinking of it…I should really get my hair done…plaint some braids or something. I took my handbag and walked out of the room. I took the car keys for my own BMW and walked out of the house. I drove to the Police Station where I was to see Eugene. I was guessing that they were still keeping him there because he only got arrested last night.

I got to the station and walked inside the building. I was about to start asking for my Eugene when I saw him walking out of another office with Lusani and Kat? Kat was already here? I wanted to turn around and walk back to the car. I mean he was with Kat for fucks sake…what was I doing here then? Plus we were no longer an item so I turned around and decided to walk out of the building
Eugene:” Andani” he called out. What do I do now? Turn around and walk to him or continue walking to my car? Well I turned around and forced a smile on my face
Me:” hey” they got to me
Kat:” Andani” she pulled a straight face
Me:” Kat…uhm hi Lusani”
Lusani:” hi” he looked at me like a jealousy girlfriend…so he didn’t like me huh? There was now an awkward silence
Eugene:” come” Eugene took my hand and walked out of the building with me.
Me:” you are out?”
Eugene:” I didn’t call Kat”
Me:” I never asked”
Eugene:” I know but your face is saying otherwise…I promise I didn’t call her…somehow she found out I was arrested and she came”
Me:” I thought she was in Joburg”
Eugene:” I don’t know when she came back but she is here”
Me:”ok” I folded my hands on my chest”
Eugene:” come here” he gave me a tight hug
Eugene:” thank you for what you did….you saved me” I loved his scent, I was soo going to miss it…I wanted to just stay there in his arms and not let go
Me:’ so it worked?” I said breaking the hug
Eugene:” it sure did…they believed that the man must have something against me because there was no trace of blood in my house...nothing at all”
Me:” you cleaned it up?”
Eugene:” my guys did”
Me:” ok…I am glad you are out”
Eugene:” yeah me too” we stood there awkwardly without saying anything else
me:” uhm I was worried, that’s why I came…I thought you were still inside”
Eugene:” not anymore and thanks to you….you look amazing, I love the shoes” I giggled
Me:” they are new” he smiled
Eugene:” ow”
Me:” I think I will get going now”
Eugene:” do you mind if I drive you?”
Me:” I have my car with me…but thanks”
Eugene:” I want to drive you…I will ask Lusani to bring your car back to the house….it’s the least I can do after what you did for me...you didn’t have to but you did it anyway” I smiled….who was I to say no to that?
Me:” ok cool then” I gave him my car keys and he walked to Lusani and Katlego. He then came back to me and took my hand and then led me to his car. He opened the door for me and I got in. The thought that all this was actually over was weighing on me. I couldn’t believe that things between us were really over. Apart from his dark side…Eugene was a sweet romantic man.

I got inside the car and he drove me home…to our home. I sighed. We drove in silence…no one was saying anything shame. We got there and I opened the door and got out. Eugene got out too. He walked me to the house and we stood at the door
Me:” thanks for driving me…so you say Lusani is bringing the car?”
Eugene:” yeah he will be here shortly” I nodded. I looked at him and he looked back at me
Me:” when are you coming for your clothes again?”
Eugene:” maybe tomorrow”
Me:” ok goodnight”
Eugene:” night” he was walking away when I said
Me:“so Kat…are you and her….i mean…” he walked back to me and took my hand and looked straight into my eyes…he was wearing a pained look on his face
Eugene:” cupcake we broke up last night…you don’t think I’d move on now do you? Especially with her? Andani I still love you so much and right now I don’t even know how I am going to cope without you so being with another woman is the last thing on my mind ok? I am not even there yet, you can relax” he was still calling me cupcake…well the assurance he gave me right now is what I was looking for…I needed to know that I meant something to him, I mean he meant a hell lot to me
Me:” thank you for that” he touched my cheek with his one hand as he looked into my eyes. I felt my blood boiling and my head suddenly started spinning…I wanted him. He slowly bent down towards me with a frown on his face as if he was in pain. His mouth touched mine
Me:” Eugene” I whispered
Eugene:” yes” he whispered back
Me:” we are not together anymore”
Eugene:” don’t you want me?” instead of giving him an answer I started kissing him. Things were starting to hit up and he was now carrying me with my legs around him while he pinned me against the door and then my BMW appeared from the gate. Eugene pretended like he didn’t see or hear the car…he continued kissing and fondling my breasts
Me:” Eugene stop” I said lightly. He quickly stopped and looked down. I felt disappointed that he stopped like that but with our history I get why he did it like that. He put his hands on both side of me holding the door with his face very close to mine
Eugene:” do we really have to end this cupcake? This is hard…being with you is hard I know but being apart? S*** Andani its f*****g painful”
Me:” Eugene don’t do this”
Eugene:”do what? Fight for us?” his eyes were burning…he looked scared and pissed at the same time
Me:” we’ve tried ok?”
Eugene:” let me try again cupcake…just one chance” I looked away
Me:” Eugene leave…what I saw yesterday scared me…you scared me, you almost hit me…I just…I want to be alone”
Eugene:” ok” shame he was in pain. He kissed me on my forehead and walked away. Lusani was already in Eugene’s car. They drove away right at that moment.

***
Eugene:” so what time Is my flight again?”
Lusani:” in two hours”
Eugene:” s*** I have to quickly get ready…uhm what’s happening with the Doctor story?”
Lusani:” give me few hours”
Eugene:” ok I will be back here tomorrow evening…after that meeting I am flying back so the Doctor and her family should be waiting for me”
Lusani:” consider it done…so you and her? What’s happening?”
Eugene:” since when do we discuss my relationships?”
Lusani:” since you got into a serious messy relationship” Eugene shook his head
Eugene:” the only reason why I tolerate you at times is because I like you, a lot so don’t ruin that” Lusani looked at Eugene and smiled
Lusani:” apart from everything I mentioned earlier on…something good came out of this….you are human after all, I mean you just had a normal relationship with a normal woman and it lasted few months…that’s something that everybody is shocked about” Eugene just stared out the window realising that the relationship was over. He was soo going to miss her.

After Eugene had left I walked back to the house and felt that maybe I needed to see my friend. I needed to see Vhusani and feel normal again. Maybe even go somewhere…to the beach maybe? The weather was looking fine for a day at the beach. I smiled as I dial Vhusani’s number
Vhusani:” my besty….i called last night and you didn’t pick up”
Me:” I am sorry love…I was kinda busy but I wanna make it up to you today”
Vhusani:” ok what’s the plan?’
Me:” take half day from work and we can go chill at the beach”
Vhusani:” you know what? that’s actually a great idea because Lala is out of town on business and my work is sooooo boring….let me take the remaining hours off neh….get ready for some waves girl” she was giggling and sounded really excited. Do you see why I called her?
Me:” hey bro I was checking the waves on wind guru hey…they kinda kief hey….very good waves today…bring your surfing board with bro…I won’t borrow you mine” I was mimicking a white guy’s voice…Vhusani was in stiches of laughter
Vhusani:” ow my God Andani you are killing me over here”
Me:” I’m series bro….bring some sun screen as well hey” I was still imitating the voice
Vhusani:” Andani you know what…let me wrap things up here so that we can start with our day as whities huh?” she was still laughing
Me:” I don’t mind acting white for few hours”
Vhusani:”cheers to being white for a moment…girl I drink to that…yeah yeah yeah” she sang. Jehovah I died shame….i couldn’t stop laughing. I wished Vhusani was already here with me.
Me:” let’s meet at Noordhoek Beach in a hour…I will bring some food and everything we need for the picnic…bring us drinks and some ice ok?”
Vhusani:” ok meet you in an hour” I hung up the phone and ran to the bedroom.
I took out my bikini and I also changed into some shorts and a tank top and some flip-flops. I then put the bikini, sunscreen, my toiletries and everything I thought I’d need into my bag. I then walked out of the bedroom and went to the kitchen where I gathered everything I was gonna need for the day, I then walked to the garage and took the rest of the stuff I needed. I decided that maybe I needed to shine a little bit. Eugene had the Rover with him so I decided to drive the Ferrari….i know we broke up and maybe I wasn’t supposed to be driving his car anymore but duhh its not like he’d stop me in the middle of the road and tell me to get out of his car. Plus he said I could keep the house…so I am guessing that he meant I could keep everything in the house too.

I drove out to the beach and I passed by the mall where I bought the food. I then drove to the beach. Vhusani’s car was already at the parking when I arrived. I parked the car close to hers and got out. She got out too…she was already in her bikini.
Me:” my one and only” we hugged
Vhusi:” change into your bikini already”
Me:” let me do it quickly” I changed into my bikini as well.
Vhusani:” soo…look at the waves….great for a surf huh?” she imitated my voice from earlier on and we burst out laughing. The funny thing is we didn’t even know how to surf, matter of fact, never tried it before
Me:” I brought a hella lot of food here so I don’t know if you are hungry or if we should be out there playing in the water already”
Vhusani:” huh uh look at those hotties over there…woman, a girl’s gotta be single for a day and flirt with some hot boys who are surfing” I smiled…I was actually single, I smiled at the thought of myself being actually available
Me:” and we can’t even surf…let alone owning a surfing board….how about we have some hottie teaching us huh?” I said with a smile
Vhusani:” we will surely score some company lovy…who can deny this black ass…like really, my F we are gifted” she said that holding her behind…I couldn’t help but laugh. We took each other’s hand and ran to the beach together. Ever felt 10 years younger than your actual age? I felt like I was 17 and for a moment every little problem or every little worry I had was gone…I was just happy to be with my friend.

We got to the water and there was a group of white guys surfing obviously. We all know how white people love the surf board. We greeted them and hey we didn’t even have to ask them they kinda offered to surf with us. We told them it’s not our thing but the boys were only too happy to show us the ropes. I was only worried about one thing…the possibilities of those guys being under 20 years were very high...i mean white kids grow up quickly so I was a little bit shy away from doing any nasty stuff. So I scored myself a hottie and Vhusani scored herself one too

Anyway I gotta say that we had a great day shame. We swam and tried to surf but it was a disaster and the poor guys just had to give up on us. The water makes you weak if you spend too much time in the water so when we were tired and hungry, the two guys decided to take us to a restaurant. Who were we to refuse a free meal? Yeah we had food in the car but our friends over here didn’t know about that. So we went to the restaurant and chilled with them. After the meal we walked out of the restaurant and just chilled on the sand talking and laughing. I never thought I could have a lot in common with a white person…don’t get me wrong I am not a racist or anything and I have attended classes with them, did group works with them and worked with them but I’d never really been friend with one….it’s always been a professional relationship.

After a lot of time of chilling it was getting late so Vhusani and I said our goodbyes and left the guys…they asked for our contacts and wanted us to have the repeat of the day but we refused. I believe that the day was perfect partly because Vhusani and I were looking for fun and fun only. But if we were to do this again, it wouldn’t be as fun…we were not looking for dates or a boyfriend, we just wanted to have a great day and we sure did. Shame I had a super duper day…I enjoyed. This carefree day is what I needed in my life. A lot had been happening and forgetting about everything for a day was what I needed.

Life as we know it
Insert 122

We drove to my house…well Gee’s house. I drove in first and Vhusani was at my back. We got out of the cars and walked inside
Vhusani:” so you say bae is not here?”
Me:” yep he is not and I have a proposition for you” I said as soon as we got inside the house
Vhusani:” let’s hear it” we took off our shoes and walked to the lounge. Damn I was tired
Me:” spend the night please” I gave her my “please I am begging you look” she melted into a smile
Vhusani:” it’s not like I have something better to do”
Me:”yessss!”
Vhusani:” but I don’t have my PJ’s and tomorrow its work, I have to wake up early and go to my office” she looked a bit worried
Me:” dude we are all size 34 so its chilled…I will give you a pair of my PJs and you can always wear one of my outfits man….i don’t know about your underwear though” I laughed
Vhusani:” I will wash it tonight”
Me:” you said something about work, why are you working on a Sunday?”
Vhusani:” there is a project that we are working on so we have to work on weekends as well…that’s why I also went today plus with Lala away I get bored on weekends”
Me:” ow owk it’s sorted then…I don’t know about you sweety but I am in no mood to cook so do you mind us just ordering something?”
Vhusani:” perfect idea…the first thing I need right now is a shower”
Me:” me too….come, let me show you to your room”
Vhusani:” the last time I was hear you caused a little scene with that Pearl girl” I shook my head laughing
Me:” don’t remind me of that please”

So after the shower we got dressed in PJs and some sleepers. We sat on the blanket on the floor in the lounge watching “Being Marry Jane” with a bowl of popcorns, pocket of Simba chips, pocket of Endearment and a 2 litre of coke on the floor and two glasses .
Me:” I don’t even remember when last I did something like this you know”
Vhusani:” I guess growing up do this to people hey but at least we still find time to see each other every now and again” she was chewing the popcorns
Me:” you are right about that”
Vhusani:” whenever I watch this series I am made to feel like my life is actually going great hey…some women have it tough out there….look at Marry Jane…she is 38 and still going through relationship s***? Yohh life can be cruel” I looked at her and laughed
Me:” you are forgetting that it’s a series neh? Marry Jane is not real” I took a sip of my coke
Vhusani:” well there are woman out there going through the same s*** I tell you” now that we were talking about this, I thought that maybe this may be a good opportunity for me to get advice from my friend regarding Eugene. Yeah we were done but I wanted an assurance that I didn’t make a mistake
Me:” now that we are talking about relationship problems...i was going through this site neh? And I saw a post about this other woman…she is about our age and she has fallen in love with a guy who happen to be an international gangster”
Vhusani:’ what?” she stopped chewing and looked at me. Ok that reaction said it all…I don’t think I needed to hear more but since I had already hinted on the topic then I better tell her everything. I had to change some things so that she don’t even suspect that I was actually talking about myself and Eugene.
Me:” yeah but the guy studied and has genuine qualifications and also has a legit business but he has shady dealings on the site. He is a very emotional person man…like he killed his parents when he was young, it was a mistake though and he was the only child…. So the memory of that day always haunts him. He never really experienced love from his parents and has always felt alone.  He ended up joining the life of drugs and after some years he became the boss”
Vhusani:” tjoo hai shame so the woman knew this all along?”
Me:” no she found out about it and he came clean. He is also a sadist. Like he is sick man…he is addicted to hurting people…but she said that he told her that she made him better, that after being with her he don’t even get nightmares and that he don’t feel the edge to hurt people. Apart from all that crap, he loves her and treats her like a queen. So she was saying that she is confused, does she stay or leave him” Vhusani took her glass and drank
Vhusani:” I don’t know hey but if she makes him better then I think all he need is someone to love him. Like he said, he never got to be loved when he was young and she is giving him something that he has always wanted. I mean as long as he doesn’t hurt her then its chilled. If it was me I’d stay and make him better. You know sometimes we judge a person by what they do and we fail to understand the reason behind it. This guy just wanna be loved and being understood that’s all and who knows, maybe one day he could change” I looked at her and smiled
Me:” mhm I never thought of it that way” Vhusani was right here, all that Eugene wanted was to be loved and yes I loved him but there was a big but….loving someone like him came at a big price…it was too much
Vhusani:” the best part about someone who has a troubled life is that once they fall in love with you and confess everything to you then they won’t leave you…you don’t have to worry about being cheated on or being dumped for someone else…such people have deep love I tell you, once he open up to you then you are the one and no one can take your place so  I wouldn’t mind to get a thug of my own wethu….at least I’d know that my seat is secured and no other woman will take it. Take him for instance…he has a real business and that other shady business…where does he get the time to cheat?” I smiled at that…again she was right…Eugene was mine and mine alone. Maybe I could try again. I mean I couldn’t deny that I still love him….eish this was confusing
Me:” now that you are speaking like that I can’t help but to suspect that there is problems in paradise” she looked at the TV and batted her eyelids…yes something was definitely wrong.
Vhusani:” why did you brought us coke…right now I feel like I need a strong whiskey” she looked at me with a sad face
Me:” Vhusani what’s wrong?”
Vhusani:” we’ve been fighting a lot lately and now he left for a workshop in Joburg on Monday and we haven’t talked since then”
Me:” Today is Saturday Vhusi…you haven’t talked for a week? Why are you not calling him?” I was now worried about my friend
Vhusani:” why is he not calling me?” I rolled my eyes
Me:” you are both being childish now and you have an empty pride. Sweety pride is not going to help you with anything…do you still love him?”
Vhusani:” that goes without a saying”
Me:” then call him Vhusani please…Lalamani is sweet and I am sure he is just busy or something…anyway why are you guys fighting?”
Vhusani:” its about the wedding…I mean we’ve been engaged for a few months now and the brother is so quiet Andi, he is not even hinting at sending his elders to my house and dude I am 28 and without a child….i can’t have kids when I am 35”
Me:” but babe…you haven’t even dated for a year”
Vhusani:” and yet he proposed to me on our first month of dating…I thought he wanted to marry me…that’s what he said when he proposed”
Me:” and you said you wanted to wait a bit longer before tying the knot”
Vhusani:” no, I said that I wanted us to get to know each other better and we’ve already done that. so I tried to ask him about it and he went crazy saying that it’s not my place to ask and that when he is ready he will send his elders…the f*** did he mean when he is ready? What does this ring mean?” she held out her hand with tears on her eyes
Me:” I am so sorry Vhusi…sometimes men are just confused”
Vhusani:” So I asked him for a baby at least” I raised an eyebrow
Vhusani:” you also think it’s crazy?” I shook my head
Vhusani:” I just don’t want to have kids when I am 35 ok? At least you have Omphu already and if Eugene want to hold off on having kids then you are cool….me on the other side…I don’t have a child yet…that didn’t sit well with him too…he said that he feels that I am rushing him…so that’s what we’ve been fighting about for the past few days” you know relationships are just not easy. When you are going through some problems you’d think that you are the only one who is not happy but the truth is that almost everyone is not happy, we are all just trying to make it wok
Me:” babe I am sorry that you are going through this ok? You need to call him though or just send an sms. You love him and you obviously don’t want him to start looking at other women now do you?”
Vhusani:” of course not”
Me:” Lalamani loves you we all know that…just be patient with him ok? Try be patient and before you know it then he’ll give you everything you want. He will surely marry you and you’ll have his kids. Vhusani you are only 28, it’s not like you are reaching menopause at 29 so chill please. Let him be ready for marriage so that he’ll enjoy it. We don’t want you getting married now and by tomorrow he is already bored. The same with the baby….he needs to be emotionally ready to be a dad otherwise it’s gonna be your burden alone”
Vhusani:’ you think?”
Me:” yes” I was nodding. Funny how we all turn into Doctor Phil when it comes to other people’s problems but we struggle to deal with our own. Here I was giving advice to my friend while my own relationship had failed.
Vhusani:” let’s just keep on watching Marry Jane for now please…I don’t wanna talk about this anymore….thanks though”
Me:”Marry Jane it is”

The following morning Vhusani woke up and prepared herself for work and left. I was left alone in the house. I didn’t want her to leave shame. I still hadn’t received anything from Eugene. Not that he was obliged to call or send a text, it’s just that I kinda expected him to send me something. Anyway I had nothing planned for my day so I decided to go to church at 10:00 in the morning. Yeah I know it’s been a long time since I set foot at church. I used to go while I was home with mom and dad though, it’s just that while I was in Cape Town I didn’t go every Sunday because I was usually busy. It felt good to be in the presence of God and I enjoyed it. I found myself also praying for Eugene to change, I was praying for some miracle…I wanted to have hope and to believe that he could be better. Even if it’s not for me but he should do it for himself. After church I called my mom and talked to my son and I also called Tebogo and Thabeleng. They were both happy to hear from me shame. That evening I prepared myself something to eat and then went straight to bed. I had nothing else to do. I was in bed and just going through my Facebook timeline which had nothing interesting when I heard a slight sound. I quickly got out of bed and went to the door and listened…it sounded like someone was opening the kitchen security door. Ok I locked my bedroom door and dialled for Eugene…maybe it was him coming for his clothes…I didn’t have to be scared right?  I dialled for him immediately and he picked up on the first ring

Eugene:” hello”
Me:” uhm hey…are you in the house?” I whispered
Eugene:” uhm no, I just landed at OR Tambo few minutes ago…I am about to drive down to Cape Town” ow my God nooo, I heard a sound again and quickly looked at the door
Me:” Eugene someone is in this house ok?” I said not being able to hide the panic in my voice
Eugene:” what do you mean?”
Me:” I heard the sound and it sounded like it was the kitchen door being opened or someone trying to open it”
Eugene:” s*** uhm ok… Dee call Lusani to go to my house right now ok? Call him Now!” he was talking to someone else
Eugene:”cupcake?”
Me:” I am still here”
Eugene:” I want you go to our walk in closet ok? Go to my shoes and take out all my sneakers…you will see something that look like a safe combination lock…please use our anniversary date to open it…go there now!!” he was shouting at me. I quickly ran to his closet and went straight to his shoes. I moved the sneakers as instructed and there I found the lock…I used our anniversary date and it opened
Me:” I opened it” I was shaking
Eugene:” there are two hand guns in there…take one of them” I started crying
Me:” Eugene noooo”
Eugene:” take the f*****g pistol Andani, your damn life depends on it ok? Do you wanna die?” he was now pissed
Me:” uhm…o…ok” I reached inside for a gun and I took one.
Eugene:” you see that long thing connected to it, that’s a silencer so don’t touch that….it will help when you start shooting so that the gun don’t make a sound” I felt a rush of fear overtaking me. I was soo scared I wanted to pee on myself. I was shaking so bad that I don’t think I was capable of using the damn gun. I heard someone trying to open the bedroom door and f*** it people I was super scared. Lusani was obviously not here yet so this was not him, it can’t be him.
Me:” Eugene they are here” I said as tears welled down. Don’t judge the s*** out of this situation…anybody is scared to die so I was no exception…I didn’t want to die…not today
Eugene:” babe….lovey please I want you to pay attention”
Me:” Eugene i…I can’t even shoot” I sobbed
Eugene:” f*** it Andani get a damn grip ok? I am not there to help you and Lusani is not there yet too so you are going to f*****g use that hand gun baby girl….you are going to shoot whoever is out there because if you don’t…..” he stopped and I heard him breathing. If I don’t they’ll kill me.
Eugene:” please cupcake follow my instructions now ok?” I nodded and then remembered that he was not seeing me
Me:” ok”
Eugene:” cupcake you are now going to hold the gun with both your hands like you see people do in the movies ok? Hold it with both hands…uhm well hold it with your right hand and use the left hand to support the right hand ok?”
Me:” ok”
Eugene:”now I want you to stay inside the closet and close yourself inside. Wait for the person or people to find you. Once they try to open the door, don’t wait to see who it is Andani….just shoot immediately, I know you won’t aim very well but if you just shoot at the person opening the door chances of you not shooting them are very slim…so you’ll surely shoot them somewhere, they won’t be expecting that and will be shocked so use that time to either shoot them again or start running….Lusani will be there in less than five minutes already” I sniffed
Eugene:” stop sniffing and don’t say anything anymore…wait for them ok baby?” I could hear from his voice that he was also scared but he was trying to be strong for me
Me:” ok”
Eugene:” I love you and remember why you are doing this. You are doing this for our son ok? He needs you cupcake….Omphu needs you more than I do so do this for him…uhm are you holding the gun the way I told you to?”
Me:” yes” I whispered
Eugene:” ok now insert your index finger on the trigger guard and let it stay there…don’t pull the trigger…wait for him…don’t drop this call…I’ll…I’ll just listen in…I love you Andi and I am sorry about this…stay focused” I went quiet and just took a deep breath. I was super scared…one mistake from me and I am dead.

Life as we know it
Insert 123

I heard the bedroom door open slowly. I then heard footsteps that were slow and a bit light. The person walked around the room and the whole time I was inside this closet shaking as hell. I was scared and was praying that Lusani could get here sooner. The footsteps walked towards me and that’s when the reality of the situation really sunk in. I couldn’t stop the tears that were coming out. I heard the footsteps stopping in front of the door and I knew that it was due or die. I aimed at the door and waited for it to open. I remembered what Eugene told me and hoped that the gun was not going to disappoint As soon as the door opened I closed my eyes and pulled the trigger…I automatically stumbled and almost fell…well they always say that shooting requires some sort of a balance but I guess I never thought of that. I regained my balance and saw a man I’ve never seen before holding his knee because that’s where I shot him. I ran past him and out of the door. I then ran to the bedroom door and open. As soon as I walk out of the door someone quickly grabbed me and pulled me to them and closed my mouth…Lord Jesus I started gasping for air because I was so scared to an extent that I couldn’t breathe properly. I looked at the man’s face and my heart relaxed when I saw Lusani starring into my eyes with his hands on my mouth. Never thought I’d be so happy and relieved to see him.

He removed his hand from my mouth and put his index finger on his mouth signalling for me to keep quiet.
Lusani:” stay here”
He walked inside the room and I was left standing at the passage feeling like I was a starring in some action movie. I couldn’t believe that this was really me, that I was involved in guns. How did my life come to this? With Rialivhuwa it was emotional and physical abuse…I was beaten up to a pulp and made to believe that I didn’t deserve better and with Mr Eugene is guns…what was wrong with me? Why not attract a normal loving man?  I then heard a slight noise that the gun make when it has a silencer. I was now not sure who was shot. After a short while Lusani walked out to me…tjooo I was so relieved
Lusani:” I dealt with him uhm…I will get some guys to come help me clean up…you can use the spare bedroom tonight ok?” he walked back in and I followed him
Me:” uhm so are you going to be around?”
Lusani:” let me clean up first” I nodded. I walked to the kitchen with Lusani at my back. I thought he said he wanted to clean up, maybe he was waiting for the other guys to come
Lusani:” go sit over there, I will make you a cup of coffee”
I walked to the lounge still feeling lost and so damn shaken. I sat there hugging my legs and rocking myself back and forth. I was crying. Lusani came with a blanket and covered me. I was still in my sleeping shorts and a vest…I didn’t care about my tits popping out and my ass moving like a jelly with Lusani around…I was too traumatized to care about anything like that. He walked to the kitchen and few minutes later he walked out the door and walk back in with two guys. He took them to the bedroom and then came back and made me some coffee. He brought me a cup
Me:” thank you” my voice was hoarse. He sat on the table facing me…he was looking straight at me like a boss looking at his junior staff with the look that just shouts “I am the boss” I don’t know why he was pulling that with me though
Me:” why are you doing this? You don’t even like me” he smiled
Lusani:” I am just doing my job…although making you a cup of coffee is not part of it, I just don’t understand why you are here” I raised an eyebrow
Lusani:” why you are with him…you don’t belong in our world Andi…you are a normal woman who want nothing but a normal relationship, this is not for you, Eugene can’t give you normal…not because he don’t want to but because he is not normal and he don’t know how to be normal” I sipped the coffee and looked away, I was not about to have this conversation with him
Lusani:” if you love him you’ll walk away from him…for good” I shook my head
Me:” does he know that we are having this conversation?” I said calmly
Lusani:” of course not and you won’t tell him”
Me:”ow?”
Lusani:” We don’t want another man dying because of you now do we?” wow emotional blackmail
Me:” I was wondering why you were being so nice to me…now I get it, it’s because you want to ask me to stay away from him”
Lusani:” it’s for your own good Andani, I’ve seen what this life could do to people and I don’t want that for you” oww now it’s no longer because I am bad for Eugene? It’s because this life wasn’t good for me? Which life is ever good for anyone anyway?
Me:” I am not having this conversation with you” I said giving him a dismissive look but he didn’t care
Lusani:” he has changed, everything that Rod worked so hard for is falling apart…he is not the same anymore Andi, you need to give him his life back” the nerve that this brother had though tjoo, he saved my life yes but he was being an ass now…he was seriously testing my patience
Me:” Lusani leave me alone ok? What I do with Eugene is none of your business” I was now angry
Lusani:” it kinda is my business…it is messing up with something that I am invested my whole f*****g life in, Andani this is not just about him ok? It’s also about someone like me…I lost everything few years back and Eugene found me and made me believe in life again, he gave me something to live for and you are just gonna waltz into his life and interfere with our plans? Lady this is my damn business” he was shouting at me. I looked at him and felt sorry for him…just like Eugene, this life was an escape from something deeper, it meant a hell lot for him as it did to Eugene
Lusani:” this is all you…people coming on to Eugene because of you, now all his focus is going to shift and he will only be thinking about you and forget about the business. So you have walk out of his life for good and you won’t mention this conversation to him…ever” I huffed and something came over me and in a split second I was standing in front of Lusani with my hand on the neck of his t shirt
Me:” when and if I decide to leave Eugene for good it will be because he wants me to ok? You can’t tell me shit about what to do”
 I was fuming. I realised what I was doing and felt even more confused. Eugene and I were done, why was I doing this then? Why did Lusani mentioning me leaving Eugene for good hurts so much? Why did it bring a violent me? I realised then that I didn’t want to be out of his life. Me still being in his house meant that I was still holding on to the hope of us working things out in the future. I looked at Lusani and his face softens…he looked at my boobs and smiled leaking his mouth. What? He didn’t…he didn’t just do that…euwww. I quickly let him go and walked away from him…I took the blanket he had covered me with earlier on and wrapped it around my chest
Lusani:” I never really understood why he kept coming back…for that body? Even I am getting tempted” I rolled my eyes in disbelief…what did he just say?
Me:” what did you just say? I will tell Eugene about this” he laughed out loud
Lusani:” really? You’re gonna get me killed for admiring you? I am just saying that I’ve been missing out on the fact that you are gifted because I was focusing more on how bad you were for our business”
Me:” you are crazy and I will tell Eugene about this” I said that and walked away
Lusani:” honestly now Andani…. I wouldn’t mind owning you you know” he walked after me. Ok people can somebody wake me up from this horrible dream…no I gotta be dreaming because this can’t really be happening…Lusani coming on to me? Some boys can be soo damn ambitious it’s not even funny. I stopped and looked at him
Lusani:” ok cool I am sorry I am acting like a love struck teenager”
Me:” no…you are acting like a sex struck virgin boy” he raised his eyebrow in shock
Lusani:” I am just highlighting that now I understand why he loves you”
Me:” can you leave me alone now?”
Lusani:” ok” he had a creepy smile on and it bothered me. His phone rang at that moment

Lusani:” Gee” I was about to walk away when I heard him say Gee’s name, I wanted to know what Eugene was saying
Lusani:” yeah it’s done and they are cleaning up….yeah I will keep an eye on her until you come back…sure boss” he dropped the call and looked at me with a smile
Lusani:” I am supposed to keep an eye on you…now where were we going again?” lord help me! When did he change from loathing me to actually having a little crush thingy over me? Jeez I was so annoyed by him…I think I liked him better when he was hating on me
Me:”you can do that while sitting in the lounge” he chuckled
Lusani:” maybe you should talk to Gee yourself…he practically want me to watch over you as in literally watch over you” he dialled a number on his phone and gave it to me. It rang once and Eugene picked up
Eugene:” Lu”
Me:” it’s me”
Eugene:” ow uhm…”
Me:” did you ask him to literally watch over me? Because I want to sleep now” he breathed
Eugene:” I know it’s not a good thing and you probably hate it but I can’t risk anything happening to you Andani…sleep in the spare bedroom and Lusani will just be sitting on the couch watching you…at this moment I don’t want to risk anyone coming through the windows and do something to you, I have to make su-“ I dropped that call shame. So Lusani was going to be my body guard? I was bothered by his smile, it was creepy
Lusani:”see? I have to keep an eye on you” this was a serious test…tjooo Satan…Devil phuma kimi please…leave me the damn alone
Me:” why the sudden creepy smiles?” I gave him my disgusted face
Lusani:” I have finally realised what Gee saw in you…it’s a beautiful site…you might not belong in our world but hey maybe you are worth risking everything for”
I frowned at him feeling more and more shocked shame. Can someone just suddenly change from hating you and wanting you to stay away to suddenly liking you? This was Satan in flesh…was this guy trying to get me and him killed by Eugene? Was he so fed up about life that he wanted to commit suicide? If that was the case then he shouldn’t drag me into it yohh
Lusani:” the moment that changed my thinking of you is when you held my shirt…I looked at that angry face of yours and realised how beautiful you are…you didn’t have make-up or some fancy hair on your head…your hair actually looks massy but damn Andani…it turned me on” I popped my eyes out eyeing him like “what the f***”
Lusani:” when I looked down on your chest…damn woman…I was finished…looking down at your thighs and I knew I could risk anything for you…I could even risk being killed by Eugene to have a piece of you” ok ok ok now I was totally finished…what the hell was this? Was this boy crazy? Maybe he had some kind of a sickness too? What kind of a sickness was this though
Me:” stop….stop that nonsense, you are not coming to the bedroom with me…I swear to God Lusani I will kill you” I was pointing at him with my finger and was so dead angry. He smiled
Lusani:” I am sorry but Gee has to find me inside that room or he will fight me for risking your life” i breathed and then stomped out of there and all the way to the spare bedroom. I could hear his footsteps behind me. Lord this was too much…isn’t this what they call harassment? This was sexual harassment at its best. I got inside the bedroom and like an unwanted virus Lusani walked in too. He sat on the couch and just stared at me…I mean like seriously just starred. I quickly got inside the blankets. I was kinda praying that he wouldn’t do anything to me…the only consolation I had was that he wouldn’t cross Eugene, he wouldn’t risk his life like that…or would he?

I slowly tried to peek at him and found him still staring at him like I was the last slice of pizza.
Me:” that’s creepy and weird”
Lusani:” I am creepy and weird”
Me:” how old are you anyway?” he smiled
Lusani:” 27” oww he was just my age…still very young than my Eugene
Me:”ok”
Lusani:” do you like me? I mean at all?”
Me:” I don’t” I was talking to him while still sleeping and I was not even looking at him
Lusani:” ok just know that I’ve always liked you…like really liked you, since the time that Eugene asked me to follow you around” I frowned asking myself when was that?
Lusani:” I hated you being with him because deep inside I wish I could have you for myself. I’ve even tried to talk him out of it because I like you so much and seeing you with him….well let’s just say that it doesn’t feel good so I had to act like I hated you but it was actually love. I just hated that you were with him instead of me so when I received that call from him today…I can’t even explain how I felt Andi, I dropped everything and drove here as fast as I could, I didn’t even think of calling back up, all I wanted was for you to be safe” I looked at him and he had a serious look now, that smile had gone
Lusani:” you can scratch what I said about looking at your boobs and seeing your thighs…this is my truth….you are loved Andi…I don’t know why but the messed up ones seem to love you insanely” I swallowed…I was not even sure what to say.
Me:” whatever it is that you are feeling about me just forget about it Lusani…I don’t feel the same…I love him” he gave me half a smile
Lusani:” you don’t know that you can love me because there is him…but if he isn’t around then….”
Me:” you didn’t just say that. You are not going to kill him for anything do you understand? Because if you do it then I promise you I will kill you myself…in fact I am just going to tell him all about this…everything that’s been happening I will tell him”
Lusani:” good, you are afraid that you might actually start liking me so you wanna get rid of me” I closed my eyes in frustration…lord grant me the strength to deal with this nuisance.
Me:” I am done with you” I covered myself with the blankets.

I tried to fall asleep but jeez I couldn’t. Not with him looking at me. Doesn’t he sleep? I Mean he should have fallen asleep or something but the nigga just stayed up watching over me as instructed. I struggled falling asleep as I think about the man who died in this house tonight and this Lusani guy talking about his stupid crush…that’s all it was, it was nothing but just a crush. Thinking about all this I then remembered that we left the two guys in the bedroom supposedly cleaning up, Lusani never went back to them so I was wondering what happened, did they lock the house when they left? They wouldn’t be as stupid as leaving the house unlocked now will they? Plus Lusani was here and was instructed to watch over me so I guess I was fine.

I don’t know when or how it happened but I finally fell asleep. I woke up hours later when I heard the door open. I looked at the couch and Lusani was no longer there. Tjoo the panic and fear that got to me. The door opened and I held on to the sheets wanting to cry. What happened to Lusani? Wasn’t he supposed to watch me? For the first time I yearned for his company…he was supposed to protect me from whoever was there…or maybe they took him first. I was still shaking and scared when Eugene walked in. Yohhh suddenly my heart relaxed and everything in my body got excited. My Eugene was back. He closed the door and learned against it looking me. there was yearning in his eyes…he was happy to see me I could see it…his body language also told me that he was only too happy to see me. He just stared at me and didn’t move. I couldn’t handle the excitement so I got out of bed and slowly walked to him. I rested my head on his chest and wrapped my hands around his waist. He waited a little longer and then wrapped his hands around me.
Eugene:” I almost lost you for good tonight” there was sadness in his voice…he was really sad
Eugene:” I am so sorry Andani” he squeezed the life out of me and I was only too happy to be in his arms…I missed that feeling. I was excited and all but there were parts of me that blamed him about what took place that night…I got someone killed because of him.

Life as we know it
Insert 123

We broke the hug slowly and I stepped back from him and looked into his eyes
Me:” you almost got me killed in here Eugene...who were those people?” I asked as I swallowed saliva and folding my hands on my chest
Eugene:” babe it’s no one you should worry about…he is dead” he was reaching out to me but I moved back
Me:” you made me shoot someone” I said in a low voice
Eugene:” would you rather he shot you? Is that it?” I looked away
Eugene:” I won’t apologise for making you shoot that man tonight Andani because I couldn’t handle losing you” I still looked away
Me:” I was soo scared”
Eugene:” I know that and I am sorry”
Me:” who was he and what did he want? Do you know?”
Eugene:” Andi don’t worry about it, I am handling it” owk what happened to cupcake, babe and lovey? That’s what he was calling me when my life was hanging by a thread and now that I was fine I was Andi and Andani?
Me:” before you got here I wanted to see you but I was also angry at you for making me do this, for making me shoot someone Eugene and for making me feel so scared…it feels horrible” tears were threatening my eyes
Eugene:” I know” he walked to me and hugged me again
Eugene:” I am sorry, if I could take the memory of what happened I would…believe me”
Eugene:” uhm I guess I should sit over there and watch you sleep then…its after three in the morning. You should have seen how I drove Andani…my car was flying…I’ve never been so scared of losing someone in my life” he said looking straight into my eyes
Me:” so you still love me?” he looked at me as if what I asked was stupid
Eugene:” how can you ask that? I still love you, I will always love you that’s never going to change. We agreed not to be together not to stop loving each other” I smiled.
Me:” talking about that…I’ve been thinking” he raised an eyebrow
Me:” I can’t live without you Eugene…I understand it’s not all rosy and green but I want to be part of it, I wanna be part of you…we belong together babe and what happened today made me realise that I want nothing more than to love you and help you become better” he looked at me and breathed with hands on his hips. He opened his mouth to talk but he closed it again. Why was he not saying anything? I know he loved me too
Me:” I know you love me and you need me in your life…I need you in mine too…I want to be with you Eugene, it won’t be easy and we won’t always agree but hey that’s what couples do and we are no different” he scratched his forehead and sat on the couch looking at me. I walked towards him with a frown…why was he not saying anything. I got to him and went down on my knees and held his hands
Me:” I am sorry for tipping the doctor and not trusting that you can do better, I always thought the worst and that was bad so I am sorry for that. I should have trusted you not to hurt them, I should have trusted you to stop yourself like you did with that man…I am willing to be the woman for you Eugene…your ride or die chick” he half smiled and then slowly removed his hands from mine. His face turned serious and cold and then sad…ok now I was scared
Eugene:” I think it’s too late for that” I frowned at him….he was with Kat? Or someone? Is that why he was out of the country?
Me:” what do you mean…why?” he got up and left me there still on my knees, he looked down on me. Oww my God Eugene don’t do this, don’t do this to me...I silently prayed
Eugene:” Andani you don’t just betray me and expect some speech to fix everything ok? You’ve broken my trust, how do I trust you with my stuff? With my business? With my life? Do you know how much you meant to me?” meant? As in past tense of means? I swallowed
Eugene:” you meant every dime thing Andi, you still do…the only difference is that now I can’t trust you with anything. I feel betrayed, belittled and lied to. I understand the reason why you did what you did cupcake I do but you should have come clean to me about it but you didn’t…you waited for me to approach you…what does that tell me? you hurt me so bad….you took me back to my dark little room because the only person I trusted with my whole being betrayed me so no Andani I can’t do this again with you. I am not about to give you an opportunity to take advantage of your position in my life and betray me again….i just feel like you don’t love me as I am, like you are looking into changing me and what if I don’t change? Won’t you drop me along the way?” I just stood there as tears fall…so he really didn’t want me back? But I loved him why was that not enough?
Me:” but Eugene I made a mistake please” I begged
Eugene:” I know it was a mistake Andi I understand that, I just don’t think that I want to gamble with my heart again, I don’t want to…I don’t think you understand the struggle I have to face now that you are out of my life…it’s a real painful struggle and right now I am not sure how I will get over it but better that than being with you and always wonder when you’ll betray ma again…there is no trust anymore” he looked sad
Eugene:” I love you too much, too deep….i love you so much it hurts Andani, every time you do something bad I will flip and lose my mind like I just did and like I did months back…I can’t keep doing this to you or to myself” I wiped my face with both my hands. I got up and looked at him
Me:” Eugene”
Eugene:” Andani”
Me:” I love you”
Eugene:” I love you too but…”
Me:” but you can’t huh?” he nodded
Eugene:” go to sleep its late” I walked to the bed and sat on it
Me:” I will move out of your house then” I was wiping off the tears
Eugene:” I told you, you don’t have to”
Me:” but we are done”
Eugene:” and this house belongs to you…I will up the security and I will have my guys looking after you every second…no one will ever enter”
Me:” but I want you to be the one looking after me”
Eugene:” I can’t do that, I am sorry” I messed up…I took advantage of the fact that he loved me and this was the ultimate payment…ending up alone. He seemed to have made up his mind and I had no choice but to live with it

Eugene:” so I found the Doctor”
Me:” ow” my heart ached for that woman’s family even though I don’t know them
Eugene:” but I won’t hurt them….i will talk to the Doctor first and find out what happened and why she did it” at least I risked my relationship for something, the Doctor’s family was not going to die
Eugene:” I am doing it for you” he half smiled…I couldn’t smile because he was still leaving me
Me:” thank you” there was hope for his redemption after all
Eugene:” go to bed” I climbed on the bed and he sat on the couch
Me:” come and sleep next to me…I know we are done but please…just today”
Eugene:” Andani i…”
Me:” Eugene just get in the f*****g bed or I will come and drag you myself” I was actually pissed. He burst out laughing…he laughed so hard that I started laughing too
Eugene:” I love that side of you” he said taking off his sneakers and his jeans and the shirt…I said he should lie next to me not be naked…this was intimidating because the brother was hot as hell. He got inside the blankets and held me from behind. He kissed the back of my ears
Eugene:” Andani are you trying to test me?” he whispered
Me:” I am not the one who asked you to take off your clothes”
Eugene:” I can’t sleep in jeans”

I tried to fall asleep but I couldn’t. I turned around and looked at Eugene, he wasn’t sleeping too.
Me:” Do you trust this Lusani guy?”  I had to tell Eugene what happened, I couldn’t risk him finding out about this any other way. He was already having trust issues with me so I didn’t want to add to that plus I think he deserved to know that his right hand man was not to be trusted
Eugene:” with my life”
Me:” he was hitting on me” he raised an eyebrow and smiled
Me:” I am serious”   had my serious look on my face
Eugene:” he wouldn’t”
Me:” so I am lying?”
Eugene:” that’s not what I am saying, I just don’t think that Lusani can be that stupid…he knows what I can do to him if he tries” he was laughing
Me:” he didn’t try Eugene…he actually was hitting on me”
Eugene:” ok tell me what he said exactly”
Me:” well he said that he like me…that he liked me from way back when you asked him to follow me around, I didn’t even know that you had me followed. Anyway he said that he now understand why you love me so much, he said something about my boobs and my thighs as well…it was creepy and disgusting”  the whole time when I was talking Eugene just gave me a plain look that didn’t give anything away. I couldn’t even tell if he was angry…he then started smiling
Eugene:” I am sure he was just playing a prank on you; he wouldn’t seriously hit on you. I know that boy and he knows me very well, he wouldn’t in a million years dare cross me. He knows I wouldn’t kill him but I’d really go all out on him so no this was a prank. I have been with him long enough to understand how he thinks…he probably wanted to test you, to see if you’d fall for it so that he could tell me how weak you are and all that s***, he wants to get you out of my life Andi, he believes you are interfering with the way I run the business so you can chill babe, he is not into you, you are mine remember?” Eugene was putting way too much trust on this boy. Or maybe he was right. What if Lusani was just putting me on a test so that when I fall for whatever he was setting up then he’d tell Eugene about it, yeah maybe Eugene was right, this was Lusani’s way of getting me out of the way
Me:” I am yours?” he smiled shaking his head
Eugene:” you know what I mean”
Me:” no I actually don’t” he smiled again
Eugene:” to Lusani and everybody who works for me…you are off limit, none of those boys can taste what was once mine” was this man even bothered by this break up? He seemed chilled like he had made peace with our break up already
Me:” ok Eugene…I think you should be careful with this Lusani character, he even suggested that if you were not around then I’d fall for him…do you understand what that means? He threatened to kill you so please Eugene be careful” he still had a chilled out smile
Eugene:” don’t worry about it ok? Now sleep”

The following morning when I woke up Eugene was gone. I looked around the room and saw a note and a credit card on the bedside table. I took it and read
“Almost losing you was a serious wakeup call…apart from all the other reasons we mentioned, I also don’t want to put your life at risk again by sticking around so that means that you’ll see less of me or not see me at all. I took some of my clothes from the closet and I think that’s all I will need for now. I also left my credit card with you, you can use it as you see fit Andi, I have money and less people to spend it with so that card is yours. Contact me if there is really something you need, other than that….Sir Gee loves you and always will love you…Goodbye”  after reading that letter I already had tears in my eyes.

***
Eugene left the house as soon as Andani fell asleep. He headed to Lusani’s apartment…he was beyond pissed. What was this boy trying to do? Hitting on his woman? That was pure disrespect. He got to the place and parked his car and then quickly walked out and all the way to the door. He had the security code to enter the building so he entered the number and entered and then walked straight to Lusani’s apartment. He took out the spare key to Lusani’s apartment and unlocked the apartment and walked in. he walked straight to Lusani’s room and switched on the light. Lusani was sleeping peacefully but as soon as the light went on he opened his eyes and was greeted by Eugene’s kill face
Lusani:” Gee?”  he frowned. Eugene quickly took him by his neck and dragged him out of the bed
Eugene:” so you are tired of this fancy life huh? You wanna die? You want me to do to you what I’ve done to other people? You wanna see me mad huh?” he was breathing fire. Lusani looked at Eugene and just knew that Andani told him…he thought she was bluffing when she said she’ll tell him
Lusani:” I am sorry bro” he cried
Eugene:” I am not your fucking bro” he kicked him several times and then stood there and looked at him
Eugene:” since you seem to know what this is about, care to explain?” Eugene sat on the chair that was there and waited for Lusani. He winced and sat on the bed
Lusani:” I was just playing with her, I wanted to see if she was legit Gee, I swear to God I wouldn’t do that to you” Eugene walked to Lusani with an evil smile on…he grabbed him by his neck
Eugene:” you know better to understand that I am not dumb so f*** the bulls*** about you tryna see if she was legit. What if she was also interested? What would have happened then huh? If she didn’t tell me? Where you going to tell me?”  Lusani opened his mouth to talk
Eugene:” Remember not to lie Lu…i will put you in a room for a full year just torturing you day in and day it. I wouldn’t even kill you, I would just make you wish you were dead…so let’s hear it”  he let him go and looked at him
Lusani:” I am sorry Gee I was just playing around with her” Eugene shook his head in disbelief
Eugene:” so you were really hitting on my woman? My f*****g woman?” he was shouting...he grabbed him by his head and hit the head with his knee and Lusani fell to the floor
Eugene:” the things I wanna do to you right now are unspeakable Lusani but you are like the only brother I have and that’s the only reason why I will let you live. So you are leaving the country tomorrow and you are never coming back…I am sending you to Mexico…it’s about time you start running things from that side” he was really angry
Lusani:” Gee please I promise you I will never do it again” he closed his eyes as his patience was failing him…he opened them again
Eugene:” you should thank me because I am not in your kitchen right now looking for the right knife to play with your body and the right fork to dig into your flesh…I should be making you pay for ever thinking that you can cross me but I am not doing that…instead I am giving you a second chance to life. So Mexico it is and I am stripping you off of all the power you had in my team…you are nothing now, I will let the whole team know that they can’t report to you anymore” he walked out of the apartment and all the way to his car. He was angry beyond the word angry. He didn’t understand why Lusani could be so stupid, he trusted him soo much…why did he do this? He sat there as he let everything sunk in…Lusani was not to be trusted anymore.

Life as we know it
Insert 125

Eugene drove to his house in Monte Vista and parked the car outside at the driveway. He was feeling heavy; he didn’t even know what to do with himself. Everything was falling apart. Lusani betrayed him and the thought of it made him sick to the stomach. He got out of the car and slammed the door and walked inside the house. He paced around the kitchen as he tries to understand everything that was happening. Was Andani worth all this trouble? Was she worth it? Was she worth losing his biggest asset? Was she worth losing Lusani? First it was Kat…I mean taking Kat off the team had its setbacks, she knew her job and was good at it so removing her wasn’t the best thing for the business but he did it anyway. But losing Lusani wasn’t going to be easy. It wasn’t just about the business….Lusani was more like his son, like a brother…he loved him, he took him in and built him. Now he had to let him go? Tears were threatening his eyes. He walked to the bedroom and changed into some sporty shorts and some sneakers. He walked to the gym room and started on some exercises. His body was failing him…he could feel that he was losing control of himself. He needed to see the Doctor, to talk to her…he needed to control this, he wanted to do something to make it stop. He was doing some sit ups but it wasn’t really helping…he started running but that didn’t help too. He knew what needed to be done…he knew what his body wanted…he was trying to control it but it was hard.

He walked out of the room with sweat dripping on his face. He walked out of the door and then bumped into Lusani. He grinded his teeth…what was he doing here?
Lusani:”I know you don’t want me here” he looked bad…like he’s been crying
Gee:”what do you want?” his face was plain
Lusani:” Eugene you are the only family I have bro….you are my everything…my dad, my brother, my mom, sister…my damn everything and I can’t leave the country knowing that we are like this…I am sorry dude…I really am. I don’t even wanna start defending myself because what I did was just wrong and I deserve whatever punishment you’re gonna give me. I was just being a boy, tryna have fun and I am sorry that I am causing you so much pain” Eugene looked at Lusani and had to stop tears from falling
Eugene:” Lusani you know how much I love that woman” he looked at him with a sad face. Lusani looked down and then back at Eugene
Lusani:” I know and I am stupid…what I did was stupid”
Eugene:” I am going to stand here and talk to you as my brother, not as your boss. Dude as your brother….you hurt me, you disappointed me…I trusted you with every fibre of my body, I thought you had my back all the way. I even trusted you enough to be in the same room with her while I was coming back…I am disappointed and I am hurt”
Lusani:” I know, I tried to imagine if someone I had taken in, someone I had supported and taught everything has done the same to me. I’d flip, I’d even kill them so I understand what I have done to you. My regret is that I have broken something that might never be repaired” he said wiping off a tear
Eugene:” I don’t want to send you away, it saddens me to know that you have to leave but keeping you here with me is risky…I feel like you can’t be trusted anymore, I can’t trust you Lusani”
Lusani:” I know”
Eugene:” dude you ruined everything”
Lusani:” Eugene I know and right now I owe my life to you…you taught me love and gave me everything that I have right now but look at how I re-paid you…I am really sorry” Eugene looked at him and cracked a smile
Eugene:” give me time to try and forget about this ok? Just leave the country. Go to Mexico and spend some time with grams and paps. I love you, you know that, that’s why this hurt so much. Having my brother wanting to sleep with my woman?”
Lusani:” I know but it was just a stupid crush…now I know that it’s not worth losing you…losing us, it’s just that it’s too late now”
Eugene:”you can leave all my keys here, leave the business phone too…i will change passwords of everything Lu…it has to be done, you have to take a break from all this until I know you can be trusted again” Lusani nodded
Eugene:” it hurts to know that I am losing a brother but you know how bad I deal with betrayal…I don’t take it very well”
Lusani:” I know”
Gee:” sure…leave everything here…I’mma be in my bedroom” Eugene walked to his bedroom and left Lusani there. Lusani left all the keys to Eugene’s premises plus the business cell phone. He felt sad for his brother….knowing that I wanted his woman must be horrible…not just a woman, the only woman he has ever loved.
Lusani:” its official…I am stupid” Lusani said to himself as he leave the house.

Eugene showered and got dressed and then took his laptop and changed the passwords to his everything. He then called paps and informed him that Lusani was coming to spend some time with them. With Lusani gone it meant that he had to be hands on with everything that was going on. How did his life become so complicated? He used to have everything under control but since Andani arrived…things were just not the same. He then left the house and went to the safety house that the Doctor was being kept. Her family had been freed in the condition that they say nothing. They were told that one word to the cops and she was dead. While he was driving to the location he remembered Mr Mabunda. He shook his head and took his phone and texted one of the guys to handle the job. He then got to the safe house and greeted Stone who was looking after the woman
Eugene:” Stone you can wait outside ok?”
Stone:” sure” Eugene walked in the house and found the Doctor sitting on the couch. She was being kept in a two bedroom house that had everything so she looked fine. She looked scared when she saw him

Doc:” Eugene I can explain” she got up as she started swallowing saliva
Eugene:” I am listening”
Doc:” they threatened me…they said I could be jailed for protecting an international criminal…I was never going to say anything to them but they made me swore not to say anything to you regarding them, they threatened to strip me off of my profession plus they said they had some good plan that could leave me free. Eugene I was not going to say anything to them I promise”
Me:” and yet you didn’t say anything to me like I asked”
Doc:” because I didn’t want you to stop with the sessions, I wanted to help you, I really did and I knew that telling you about the police was going to stop you from seeing me” she had tears in her eyes
Eugene:” you expect me to believe that?”
Doc:” it’s the truth, you need help and I can help you” Eugene half smiled
Eugene:” how about helping me now…at this point and time I know for a fact that you are not bugged or anything like that and if you say anything to anyone about what I am going to tell you then it’s gonna be your word against mine. So let’s do this” Eugene couldn’t trust the Doctor completely but he knew that he needed her help, he needed to talk to someone
Doc:” Eugene you are a very interesting client to me and with everything that’s been going on in your life I am more than willing to help you. I don’t think I even need your money…I think I need your sanity more than the money you can give me so please I want you to know that you can trust me. You can trust me to help you with your life ok?” he laughed
Eugene:” trust? I have been giving that away too much lately and it hasn’t been good” she smiled
Doc:” I want you to trust me though…now that I am not being tortured or my family being killed…I wanna be here for a week helping you out and after that you can send me home…I wanna be with you for a week in each months….five days for us to talk and help you get in touch with that little innocent boy you once was…we can have three hours or two hours talk every day, starting now” Eugene looked at this woman and couldn’t believe what he was hearing. After everything that’s happened she still wanted to help him?
Eugene:” so you are not scared?”
Doc:” my job gets boring if there is no challenge. Consider this a challenge in my career…I want to look at you one day and feel proud that I made you better” Eugene found himself smiling
Eugene:” a lot has been happening lately Doc…I’ve lost myself”


***
 After reading the letter that Eugene left I went to the shower and took a long one. When I was done I came back to the room and got dressed in my tracksuits. I had no plan to go anywhere. So I started sweeping around the yard…it wasn’t that dirty though but I wanted to keep busy. I was feeling funny, I was a bit nauseous and dizzy…I suspected that maybe it was because of all the stress I was carrying. When I was done I cleaned the whole house and then did the laundry and then when I was done I started watching TV. The funny feeling I was having earlier on was gone, I was feeling a bit normal. I was busy with the TV when Jake sent me a message asking me to meet him at lunch time. I had nothing else to do so why not. I agreed. I went to the bedroom and got dressed in denim shorts, sleeveless military shirt that was just below my ass and a brown ankle boots…it was hot outside and my meeting with Jake was nothing than just lunch so my outfit was perfect for a day out in a restaurant. I combed my hair and tied them up in a messy bun and then wore some shades and took my handbag. I was about to leave when I went back and took some bracelets and a necklace. I smiled at myself when I looked at myself on the mirror. I looked young shame. I walked out of the house and decided to drive a Ferrari…a girl’s gotta enjoy this life. I was stressed out about Eugene but I had to try and move on. Going out with Jake was not me moving on but me trying to have a life since I didn’t have a job anymore. Maybe I should start looking for jobs, or maybe just volunteer as well…I needed to keep busy. Or I should just go back home, there was nothing keeping me here.

He suggested that we should go to La Mouette but I refused…I didn’t want to go to some romantic expensive fancy restaurant with him…we were friends and we needed to go to a place that was going to be comfortable so I told him that its better for us to hit spur and he agreed. I went to spur and we met there.
Jake:” hey there” I smiled
Me:” hey” he got up from his seat and gave me a hug, after the hug he pulled a chair for me. I was as shocked about this as you are…we were supposed to be friends
Me:” thanks”
Jake:” you look amazing” he said as he sat down on his chair
Me:” thanks Jake” I smiled shyly…yah I don’t know where the shyness was coming from. The waitress came and took our order. Damn I was feeling nauseous again, I don’t know what perfume that waitress woman was using but it was bad…I literally couldn’t breathe…I took a sigh of relief when she left our table
Jake:” you’re ok?” I nodded
Me:” yeah I just don’t like her perfume anyway you are going back to work after this?”
Jake:” nope…I decided to take an afternoon off” I raised an eyebrow
Me:” I hope it was not for me…I mean I wouldn’t want to interfere with your job” well the real reason was that I didn’t want him to have any funny ideas. I still had my ring on me
Jake:” don’t worry about it” he was smiling. My phone rang at that moment...i didn’t know the number so I had to pick up
Me:” sorry I have to take this”
Jake:” sure”
Me:” hello”
“Andani its Lusani”
Me:” ow” I was seriously not in the mood for this guy…especially with Eugene thinking that everything he did last night was nothing
Lusani:” I am sorry about last night I really am…uhm I am leaving the country first thing tomorrow morning so I just want you to know that I am sorry if I made you feel disrespected. I feel bad for what I did to Gee so yeah this is it. And ow, I know you love him and he loves you too Andi…so continue to love him…with me gone he will need you to make him sane so that he will still be able to run the operations” ok now I was confused…why was Lusani leaving all of a sudden?
Me:” uhm…I don’t even know what to say, does Eugene know you are leaving? I mean I don’t want you to leave because of what happened, Eugene needs you” I looked at Jake who seemed to be paying attention to what I was saying and that made it quite difficult for me to say more
Lusani:” Andani you told him the truth, did you expect him to let me stay? I am just thankful that he didn’t kill me. he want me gone though so I just wanted you to know that I was sorry before I leave and to also ask you to give him another chance, he loves you” well I tried giving him another chance, he is the one who don’t want second chance…it’s all him
Me:” uhm I am sorry…and as for him, I tried but he doesn’t want to do it anymore” with Jake’s eyes piercing through me I couldn’t really say what I really wanted to say
Lusani:” take it from me Andi he loves you. He is just scared that you’ll hurt him again, I mean he has a soft spot for you so if you really love him…fight for him…goodbye” he dropped the call. I looked at the phone after that phone call feeling a little bit confused. So Eugene believed everything I said? I thought he didn’t take it serious…I guess he just didn’t want me to worry. I was starting to worry about him though. He needed Lusani on the business, I really didn’t want them to fight because of me. I was feeling bad. As for Lusani being Team AndiEugy, I was still shocked
Jake:” bad news?” I gave him a fake smile
Me:” sort of”
So I had lunch with Jake and after lunch we chilled and just talked. I still had my ring on my finger because I didn’t want to give him wrong ideas, I didn’t even want him to know that Eugene and I were no longer together because that would seem like I was inviting him into my life. Anyway after a lot of chatting and laughing we said goodbyes and I drove back to the house.

That evening I went to bed early because I was tired of cleaning and also because I hardly slept the previous night. There was a car parked at my gate and I knew it was the guys who were supposed to be looking after me. I had Eugene on speed dial just in case something happens again. I missed Eugene so bad. I knew that I still wanted him in my life but I couldn’t force him into being with me. As for the pistol I had it under my pillow…a girl gotta protect herself outchea.