Insert 111
After breakfast and a bit of chilling we went to prepare ourselves. Eugene and I walked to the bedroom with him at the front and me behind him. We were fine while we were sitting outside with the others but I knew I had to apologise for snooping.
Me:” cupcake?”
Eugene:” yes”
Me:” I want to apologise for checking your phone while you were sleeping…if I really wanted to do it then I should have at least done it in your presence, I am sorry”
Eugene:” even in my presence why do you have to do it though? Have I given you a reason not to trust me? I have been forthcoming about everything and if this relationship is to work out then you need to trust me and the things I tell you”
Me:” I know that babe and I am really sorry, I trust you”
Eugene:” are sure you do?” I walked to him and took his hands
Me:” I seriously do Eugene”
Eugene:” I don’t like fighting you” I smiled
Me:” I know and I don’t want us to fight either…I love you and thanks for this type of love. I feel like singing the high school musical song right now” he laughed
Eugene:” high school musical…what’s that?” I laughed
Me:” well it’s a Disney movie…I watched it while I was still in high school and I have repeated it like 100 times already. Well there is this one song that just deeply speaks about us” he gave me that charming smile of his
Eugene:” now I am interested in high school whatever” he carried me and I wrapped my legs around him with my hands wrapped around his neck…damn I was in love with my thug
Eugene:” I am waiting for you to sing…might as well put you down if you aren’t singing” I giggled
Me:” ok I am not a good singer so I will just tell you the words” he still had that smile on his face
Me:” and ow by the way I love that smile” he looked at me shyly
Eugene:” I am waiting for the words”
Me:”ow yeah here it goes…it’s like catching lighting the chances of finding someone like you, it’s one in a million the chances of feeling the way we do, and with every step together, we just keep on getting better, can I have this dance…can…i….have…this…dance” he slowly put me down and looked at me with a killer smile shaking his head
Eugene:” and you say it talks about us?” I nodded with a smile
Eugene:” lemme give you that dance then” I frowned at him
Me:” dance?”
Eugene:” yes madam” he handed out one hand and I slowly took it
Me:” I am not even sure what we are about to do here” he giggled
Eugene:”me too but I want to do this” he took one hand of mine and put his other one on my waist…I did the same to him and we started moving slowly
Me:” with no music?”
Eugene:” with no music” honestly speaking I was in love with this man and he kept on surprising me every single time…I was seriously feeling bad for checking his phone
Me:” it’s really like catching a lightning…how many thugs out there has the qualities that you have…how many are as good hearted as you are or as loving and considerate…you are one of a kind…my own personal gift” he smiled
Eugene:” and she is calling me a thug” we laughed softly looking into each other’s eyes as we move slowly. I was not much of a dancer but this didn’t need a formula…it was just a simple movement between two lovers, it didn’t have to be perfect…all it needed was a chemistry and we had lot of it
Me:” my thug”
Eugene:” you are right though…it really is like catching a lightning…I never dreamt of feeling this strongly about someone. I never thought I could love someone this much but I do and it’s a beautiful feeling…you are engraved in my heart cupcake….a love like this don’t just happen every day and not to everyone so yeah we are one of a kind” when he said that I felt a bit emotional so I stopped moving and just rested my head on his chest
Me:” thank you”
Eugene:”no thank you” we hugged for a little while when Eugene said
“can we prepare ourselves for the afternoon? I mean I am sure Rinae and Mulalo have already started” we broke the hug
Me:” yeah there is that…let me iron our outfits and you can go to the shower so long”
So after all the preparations to go to the resort we finally left the house at around three. We cooked pap and prepared some salads and had some drinks on the coolers…we were going to braai some meat when we get there. We drove by town where Eugene and I bought some swim wear as we didn’t have any. We then drove to the Resort. We got there and the place was fine, especially because there were only few people. It’s such a pain to go to a resort only to find that the place is fully packed so we were fortunate. We got there and chose a sight close to a braaistand where we set up our camp chairs, our table, umbrellas, coolers and so on. The guys immediately started preparing the meat. My sister and I changed into our bikinis and went to the water so long. I don’t even remember the last time I was in the water swimming. I then got out of the water and went to Eugene who was now eating some strawberries with a glass of wine on another hand.
Mulalo:” bro keep an eye here ok?” he was talking looking at the meat that was already on the stand
Eugene:” sure thing” Mulalo had already changed into some shorts so he followed his wife to the swimming pool.
The meat was almost ready when I saw my sister charging towards us with an angry face. Ok now I was shocked. Mulalo came charging behind her
Mulalo:” I really think you are overreacting” she turned around and looked at him
Rinae:” what? Overreacting? I am just tired of all this, of putting up a front and pretending to be happy” she walked to us and sat on her camp chair. Eugene and I just looked at each other and then at the meat
Mulalo:” can we do this some other time please?” yeah I thought so too, I was really not comfortable with having them argue in front of our faces
Rinae:” no we are doing this now because I know it’s never going to happen again…the only time you ever give me attention is when we are with other people. Do you know why it hurts the most? It hurts because it makes me realise that you can see that what you are doing is wrong that’s why you act differently around people but you still do it anyway” he looked at her looking all confused
Mulalo:” what did I do Rinae? All I did in there was try to be intimate with you” she popped her eyes out in a dramatic rachet way
Rinae:” what did you do? People he doesn’t know what he did wrong? Intimate? Do you even know the meaning of the word? You were only doing that for my sister and her fiancée, you wanted them to think of us as perfect, that’s what you always do….why would I want to be intimate with you in a pool at a resort when you hardly touch me at home…we do have a pool at home do you ever take a swim with me?” he ran his hands through his head. At that moment I wished I could just disappear. I took Eugene’s hand and started walking
Rinae:” no you are not going anywhere Andani, stay right there” uhm ok…I looked at Eugene who obviously didn’t want to be here anymore
Mulalo:” I understand your frustrations but…”
Rinae:” no you don’t understand my frustrations…you want me to tell you about my frustrations? I am soooooo sexually frustrated right now”
Mulalo:” babe please” she laughed out loud
Rinae:” wow so that word still exist in your vocab? When last did you call me that? Better yet, answer this one…please I dare you to answer this one….when last did we have sex?” owww God please no, don’t do this, not in front of us. I went to sit on my camp chair and looked away from them….i didn’t want to look at them
Mulalo:” uhm”
Rinae:”see…you don’t know Mulalo, it’s been months and the last time we did it I initiated it and you did it like you were doing me some favour. I am tired of pretending, it’s so painful….i feel like you’ve fallen out of love with me and you are just there because we share everything but you don’t want me anymore” she was now crying…I wanted to go and hug her but the timing was so wrong
Mulalo:” I do love and I am sorry for everything”
Rinae:” sorry for what? For not touching me? For only engaging in a conversation with me when it’s about the bills or the kids? For being a stranger in our bedroom? I don’t even know what I did wrong” he moved to her and tried to touch her
Mulalo:” I am so-“
Rinae:” stop it because if I didn’t lose it then you weren’t gonna apologise, we’d still be in the pool pretending” he moved away and sat on his camp chair and just looked at her.
Rinae:” I am done”
Mulalo:”huh?”
Rinae:” with you…I am done with us, I’ve tolerating way too much s*** it’s about time I accept what’s in front of me…we are over” she sniffed
Mulalo:” babe please don’t do that” he was now on his knees in front of her
Me:” I am sorry but I need a bathroom”
Eugene:” yeah let me walk you to the bathroom”
Eugene and I walked away as quickly as we could. When we were far away from them we took a sigh of relief
Me:” jeez I can’t believe that this is happening to them” I was seriously emotional
Eugene:” it’s sad” he said through greeted teeth
Me:” yeah it is” he came in front of me and held my face with both his hands and looked deep into my eyes
Eugene:” I want you to promise me something”
Me:” ok”
Eugene:” that can never be us Andani, whatever happens between us that s*** can’t happen to us…i…I am terrified right now…like I just can’t picture us going through s*** like that” there was real fear in his eyes
Me:” it can never be us I promise”
Eugene:” I promise to make love to you whenever you wish”
Me:” and my body is yours too whenever you wish” he then took me in his arms and squeezed me tight
Eugene:” If that’s what marriage do to people then I am scared” I broke the hug and looked at him
Me:” wow you really are scared of this” I was scared too but I was surely not as shaken as Eugene seemed to be
Eugene:” just imagine staying together every day and running out of things to say to each other and then on top of that there is no romance…it’s like you are a brother and a sister….the thought of that s*** happening to us scares me” I smiled
Me:” like we said, it can never be us” he took a deep breath
Eugene:” they need our support and I am going to have some man to man word with your brother in law” I looked at him dead in the eye
Eugene:” don’t worry I am not talking about the other word…I mean talking to him as in talking to him” I smiled at him
Me:” you haven’t been married yet and you want to advice him”
Eugene:” and yet I can differentiate right from wrong and your brother in law is wrong in so many ways”
Me:” I think we’ve spend enough time in our bathroom” we laughed and he took my hand and walked back to the others.
It was awkward when we got there. My sister was still sitting where we left her and her husband was busy on the meat. It seemed ready. Well there was a big tension now…no one was saying anything to anyone. So we just ate in total silence and then drove home in that same silence. We didn’t swim or take pictures or relax more. We got home and Mulalo parked the car. Rinae quickly got out and I ran after her.
Me:” Rina” I was behind her
Rinae:” I know I embarrassed you in front of your fiancée and I am sorry”
Me:” no you didn’t”
Rinae:” I am not a kid you know…I know what I did was way out of line”
Me:” at least you told him how you feel” we got to the house and she walked straight to her bedroom and I followed. She threw herself on the bed. I just stood in the middle of the room and looked at her.
Rinae:” it hurts so bad Andi…I just couldn’t do it anymore and I just exploded”
Me:” I fully understand”
Rinae:” I miss him, like the old him”
Me:” I am sorry”
Rinae:” I love him, God knows I do but this pain….Andani I can’t do it” I sat on the bad and helped he sit up and I hugged her
Rinae:” I have been trying so hard to make it work…I wanted to make mom and dad proud…wanted to be like them Andi…when your marriage failed mine was already on the rocks and I knew then that I can’t leave, our parents can’t have both their girls divorced but it’s not worth the sacrifice, its tearing me apart” she broke down.
Life as we know it
Insert 112
Me:” so are you sure you want to leave him?”
Rinae:” I am not sure Andi, I haven’t been sure about this marriage too so I might as well just end it, at least I’ll be a bit happy”
Me:” I just can’t believe that Mulalo could be so cruel…he seemed so sweet” I hugged her again and then she broke the hug
Rinae:” there is more”
Me:”more?” ow my God don’t tell me that he’s been hitting her too
Me:” did he physically assault you?” I couldn’t hide the shock the accompanied my voice. She shook her head. Yohh what a relief
Rinae:” it’s nothing like that” she got up and walked to the door and open it, she looked outside and then walked back and locked the door
Me:” what’s up?” I couldn’t wait to hear the more she was talking about. She started pacing in the room while shaking her hands as if feeling cold
Me:”Rinae you are scaring me” she stood in the middle of the room and looked at me
Rinae:” I haven’t told anyone about this…you are the first person I am telling. None of my friends knows, I mean they don’t even know my marriage is not working out”
Me:”tell me already”
Rinae:” I’ve been seeing someone” I looked at her for several seconds without blinking….no, not my precious perfect sister, she can’t cheat on her husband, no she didn’t…this has to be some sick joke
Me:” no” I was dead serious
Rinae:” I know it’s disgusting and ugly but I wanted to feel loved, to be touched and to be made love to and….the other guy gave me that” I just looked at her shame. I had a lot to say and decided not to say anything. I’d been in that position before…I had cheated on Eugene, although we were not married but I did it for a very lame reason so at least my sister here had a valid reason. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that what she was doing was right; I am just saying that I was not the one to judge her. Especially with how she was being treated, one can only tolerate so much so I guess she did what she felt was right at the time
Rinae:” are you gonna say something or keep staring at me like that?”
Me:” I am sorry I don’t know what to say”
Rinae:” yeah I know, I don’t know what to say to myself either”
Me:” so the new guy…you love him?” she frowned
Rinae:” of course not”
Me:” he is married?”
Rinae:” yes so there is no attachment there”
Me:” but he is betraying his wife with you” she closed her eyes breathing heavily and then open them again
Rinae:” and you think I don’t know that? Sometimes life can hit you so hard that you just wanna be foolish for a while and think only for yourself…that’s what this marriage did to me. He treated me like dirt, like I meant nothing….i am invincible to him…I wanted to be seen for a change Andi and Lufuno sees me”
Me:” that’s his name?” she nodded
Rinae:” you hate me don’t you? You are so calm about this which means you don’t wanna tell me what you really think”
Me:” it’s not that…well yeah I am a bit disappointed but…you are only human” I just didn’t want to come out and tell her that I understood her situation because I’ve been there….and I got punished for it
Rinae:” stop with that bull; I wanna hear what you really think”
Me:” uhm ok you should break it off I mean if your husband find out about it he will kill you…man don’t deal well with wives cheating so I suggest that you must deal with your separation and hope that he don’t find out you’ve been cheating” I was calm when I was talking to her. there were parts of me that wanted to shout and tell her that she’s been stupid and crazy to cheat but then there was a voice always reminding me that I am not a saint myself so I didn’t want to sound too judgemental plus she felt bad already so she didn’t need me rubbing it in
Rinae:’ you don’t think I am a slut? Or a bad person for making this his fault while I’ve been sleeping around”
Me:” when did you start seeing the guy?”
Rinae:” two months ago”
Me:” and when did your husband started acting up?”
Rinae:” more than a year ago”
Me:”see? You only did what you did because you were frustrated so come here…you need my hug not my judgement…come here” she walked to me and I hugged her
Me:” you really need to break the affair off and think about what you wanna do next”
BACK TO THE GENTS
After Rinae and Andani ran out of the car Mulalo got out and Eugene did too.
Eugene:”and where are you going?”
Mulalo:” bro I am tired and I just want to rest…i am sorry about all this” Eugene walked to him and grabbed him by his collars
Eugene:” dude you are apologising to me for the fact that your wife finally opened up? You’ve been mistreating her for months” he was pissed…Mulalo tried to remove Eugene’s hands from his collars but he failed, Eugene’s grip was tight and he just stared at him dead in the eye
Mulalo:” let me go”
Eugene:” how about a no” Mulalo raised an eyebrow
Eugene:” do you physically or emotionally abuse her? Have you ever hit her? Or make her feel emotionally unstable?” Mulalo opened his mouth to talk
Eugene:” and don’t even think about lying because I will know if you are” that was nothing short of a warning…Mulalo was being warned. He looked at Eugene and felt scared, he didn’t understand how someone’s eyes can have such effect on him…he had changed, he was not the usual friendly Eugene that he has been hanging out with
Mulalo:” dude wha…what is happening with you? You wanna fight me?”
Eugene:” not really, if you don’t give me the right answer then fighting is not the right word for what is to come, I am waiting for my answer” Mulalo swallowed
Mulalo:” I am not a woman beatter I respect women. Rinae is a successful educated women and I don’t think I will ever be able to put her down with my words so no I don’t abuse her in anyway” a smile crept on Eugene’s face and he let go of Mulalo and brushed his collars with his hands
Eugene:” you’ve just saved yourself, I am allergic to women abusers…so what’s happening with you? Why are you doing this to your wife? To your family?” Mulalo swallowed
Mulalo:” bro I don’t know what’s wrong with you but what was that? You acting all violent and stuff?” Mulalo seemed confused and shaky
Eugene:” well my dad used to physically abuse my mom so that stuff really push me to the edge…I thought you were doing the same to your wife…harde mfana” he patted his shoulder
Mulalo:” ow I am sorry”
Eugene:” it’s cool…so your wife? Why are you being like this to her? To your family?” Mulalo walked to the garden and Eugene followed. They sat on the lawn
Eugene:” so?”
Mulalo:” I love that woman bro I really do but…” he breathed
Eugene:” but?”
Mulalo:” she is too much sometimes”
Eugene:’ all women are too much…you scared the s*** out of me out there, I am scared of this whole marriage thing as is” he looked at Eugene and smiled a bit
Mulalo:” well things were fine between us after getting married. But Rinae has this group of friends she hung around with since high school…so here is the thing…these girls, well now women…they want a uniform life…like everything of theirs has to be the same and then their husbands has to act like robots who are programmed to do certain things but never really has a say” Eugene raised an eyebrow…this was some scary s***, he thought to himself….can Andani do this? No she wouldn’t, she doesn’t have much friends so maybe they won’t come to this
Eugene:” that’s bad”
Mulalo:” you haven’t heard half of it…you see this house? This was all her and her friends…they literally used to have meetings together deciding on the house, I tried to tell her what I wanted but no, my opinion didn’t matter. At first I was fine with it…we were about to get married when we bought this house and I was madly in love so I was hell bent on making my wife-to-be happy so I let her have her way. But when we got married….it was too much. She has her own dreams and goals and she want them all to come true…for example, we had a fight about the kids schools…she wanted the other school and I wanted the other so she emotionally blackmailed me saying that if I loved her I’d let them go to the school she chose. That’s been our life…the vacations we go to…it’s all decided by her and her precious friends…I just got tired of feeling like I don’t matter, like I have no say. Yes we have money both of us but all she cares about is my pocket and not my opinions or what I want….the only thing I managed to choose in this house is my car and that’s about it”
Eugene looked at Mulalo and suddenly felt confused, after hearing Mulalo’s side he was not sure which side to take
Mulalo:” so I got tired of acting in this movie she was directing. I mean as we grow older then it was not funny for me anymore…at first it was fun to watch her decide on stuff but it got too much. You see the clothes I wear? She wants to dress me, tell me what to wear and what not to. now that we are not talking much, I have the freedom to dress whichever way I want…and…well I am not proud to say this but I met someone who made me feel like I am living a real life not acting in some movie”
Eugene:” in other words you are cheating on your wife?”
Mulalo:” I guess you can say that….i don’t want to cheat on her but I am tired of coming home to her nagging me about what she has been discussing with her group of friends so that’s why I don’t talk much with her anymore”
Eugene:” Have you communicated with her?”
Mulalo:” she is not gonna listen”
Eugene:” have you tried her?”
Mulalo:” I know my wife, she won’t give up her crazy group of friends for anything, not even for me”
Eugene:” bro talk to your woman…tell her what you just told me…come clean about cheating too and why it happened…you might be able to save this marriage” he breathed
Mulalo:” eish”
Eugene:” come lets go” Eugene got up and Mulalo followed as well. They walked to the quiet house and all the way to the main bedroom.
There was a knock on the door. I went to open and found Eugene and Mulalo standing there
Eugene:” is Rinae in?”
Me:”yep”
Eugene:” ok babe come with me” I took Eugene’s hand and left.
Me:” what’s that?” he smiled
Eugene:” I had a word with him and somehow I understand what pushed him to the edge but I asked him to communicate with her”
Me:” you understand why he is mistreating his wife? I can’t believe you just said that”
Eugene:” babe I am not about to fight with you about their fight…it has nothing to do with us so chill please” I smiled
Me:” ok so you say they stand a chance?”
Eugene:” communication always fixes things…even if they don’t fix their issues at least they are talking about them now…the biggest problem is that the problem started long before they got married but was never taken serious so let’s hope for the best” we walked to our bedroom
Eugene:” what’s that smile?” I walked to him and took his hand
Me:” you’ve just tried to fix my sister’s marriage….good lord you are a keeper”
Eugene:” ow I am?”
Me:” you are too perfect Gee…the fact that you care so much about me and my family means everything” he hugged me
Eugene:” I’ll do anything for you” his phone rang at that moment.
Eugene:” sorry about that” he broke the hug and took the phone and answered
Eugene:” shoo L….huh….ow?....uhm ok? No no no don’t do that? I am not coming down anywhere I told you I am not available….dude what’s the meaning of second in charge or standing in for someone? It means that you take all the hard decision on behalf of the person who left you in charge so you my boy better find your monster mask and put it on, if you don’t have one then you better have one made for you because I can’t always be the one that people fear…work your magic and make it work….i don’t care…..i should not receive another call from you telling me this typpa kak….put the situation under control, don’t disappoint boy…I am counting on you, you know how big that project is…sure mfana” he dropped the call and just stood in the middle of the room for a while without moving or saying anything
Me:” if you have to leave I will understand” he looked at me and smiled
Eugene:” not happening, come here”
Life as we know it
Insert 113
So the following morning I was the first one up and headed to the shower where I took a quick shower and then dressed in something simple and then walked down to prepare some breakfast. I was already halfway through when Rinae walked in.
Rinae:”morning sis” she said with a smile opening a fridge
Me:” morning back to you” I smiled back at her. She took out a naartjie and started pealing it off
Me:” so? That smile?” Eugene walked in right at that moment.
Eugene:” morning ladies”
Rinae:” morning”
Me:”hey”
Eugene:” babe are you close to finishing up? tjoo I am seriously starving” he said with one hand on his tummy
Me:” give me 15 minutes to finish up my love” he kissed me on my cheek and then walked outside the house.
Me:”so?” She started eating her fruit
Rinae:’ we talked”
Me:” and?” I was getting impatient; I just wanted her to give me all the details
Rinae:” ok love was made….yeah lil sis it was magical” I just giggled
Me:”finally”
Rinae:” yeah but we still have a long way to go so we agreed to start with the marriage counselling….he’s been seeing someone too and he told me the reason why…well I came clean too and that didn’t really go well but at the end of the day we both understood why each of us went outside our marriage…at least we communicated so for the first time in years…he made me realise something that I was not aware of, I wanna work on my marriage Andi…there is hope” I gave her a hug with a smile
Me:” I am so happy that you guys are working on fixing your marriage” we broke the hug
Rinae:” I am happy too…can you believe we slept at around three this morning?”
Me:”huh?”
Rinae:” yeah there was lot of fighting, then make up sex and more fighting and then more make up sex” shame I burst out laughing
Me:”hey I am still your little sister so I don’t want any details…as long as you guys are happy then I am cool” we laughed and finished up preparing the breakfast.
After breakfast Eugene and I prepared ourselves to leave and we packed out bags and took them to the car. Rinae and Mulalo walked us to the car.
Mulalo:”it was nice having you guys here, I really wish you could stay longer…Eugene my bro…thank you” he shoulder bumped with Eugene and then came to me for a hug…Eugene also hugged my sister
Mulalo:” you guys saved our marriage…so thanks hey” Eugene and I looked at each other and smiled
Eugene:” I guess tomorrow when things are not going well at our side I can always give you guys a call then?” we all laughed
Rinae:’ you are most welcome to”
Eugene:” you guys should come down to Cape Town sometime”
Me:” great idea…you should discuss it and get back to us”
Mulalo:”we sure will” we said our final goodbyes and we left.
Eugene and I drove back to Makhado. It was already late when we got there. We booked Eugene into a hotel and then I drove home. I found my mom and Dad sitting in the lounge with my son. I spent the evening with my son and my parents saying my goodbyes as it was my last night at home. I was finally going back to Cape Town. I haven’t been down there since Rialivhuwa’s death so part of me was happy to be going back but the other part??? Well I don’t know. At least I was gonna meet my friend Vhusani shame, I missed her.
The following morning I said goodbye to my parents and my son and drove out of the house. I went to Eugene in the hotel and we drove down to Cape Town together. We exchanged driving few times on the way. We got to Cape Town late at night. Eugene insisted that we go to his house. We got there and we were welcomed by the smell of an empty house. There was nothing to eat so we ordered some pizza for the evening. I was dead tired so after eating I went straight to bed and left Eugene sitting working on his laptop.
The following morning I woke up and found him with his hand wrapped around me. I tried to remove it but his grip was tight around me. Why though? How did he expect me to get out of bed with his hand wrapped around me like this?
Me:” babe”
Eugene:”mhm”
Me:” remove your hand please” he slowly removed it and I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. When I came back he was sitting on the bed
Eugene:” so when do we go to your house to collect your stuff?”
Me:”huh?” I was confused
Eugene:” yeah I mean if there are also furnishers that you really like then we can make space for them here….as for your clothes I am sure we are taking everything” I walked to him and sat on the bed with my confused face
Me:” why are we taking my stuff Eugene?” he looked at me as if I had just asked him the most stupid question in the world
Eugene:” we are staying together right? I mean you don’t expect us to do that up and down again do you?” I looked away from him. I never thought about moving in with him
Me:” but we’ve never discussed me moving in with you”
Eugene:” but we are discussing it now” this is not fair serious
Me:” but you never asked me to move in with you”
Eugene:”ow…I didn’t think I have to”
Me:” well you really have to” I said that taking my cell phone and dialling Vhusani. Eugene threw himself back on the bed in defeat…he gotta learn to ask…I am not just moving in with him. vhusani picked up her phone
Me:” hey best friend…guess who is back in town?” I heard her scream from the other line
Vhusani:” seriously?”
Me:” yeahhhh baby…can we do lunch?”
Vhusani:” oww yeahhh let’s do lunch Andi, I miss you so much”
Me:” see you in few hours friend”
Vhusani:”ciao” we dropped the call
Eugene:” am I invited to that lunch?” he said with his face down on his pillow….damn I laughed out loud
Me:” you are joking right?”
Eugene:” not really…so am I going to be invited?” I rolled my eyes
Me:” of course not”
Eugene:” and the moving in arrangement? Please babe let’s do this” he was now looking at me
Me:” Eugene I love that romantic you…this chilled out person who is assuming that I am automatically moving in with him? hauwa shame I don’t know him” he burst out laughing so hard that I found myself laughing too
Eugene:’ so I made a mistake by setting a bar way too high hey?” he was still laughing
Me:” you sure did….so breakfast…what do you want?” he looked at me and smiled
Eugene:” I want you” I couldn’t help but giggle
Me:” no man Gee I mean the food”
Eugene:” I hear what you are saying but I want you as my breakfast” I shook my head laughing
Me:” ok I am not bothering myself with you anymore….i am going to prepare something to eat”
Eugene:” since you don’t want me to have you then just count me in” I laughed as I walked out of the room. When I got to the kitchen I saw him walking in too. Damn it Eugene he was only wearing his undies
Me:” babe that’s not appropriate”
Eugene:” but it’s just me and you cupcake”
Me:” but babe I am tryna make food here”
Eugene:” and I am tryna cope….i am sexually frustrated here” owww my word…I died….i couldn’t believe that he pulled this off on me….not that statement…I looked at him and he was laughing too
Me:” you didn’t just tease my sister now did you?” I asked laughing…he couldn’t even answer me because he was busy laughing
So after my beautiful morning with my sexually frustrated fiancée I finally got ready for lunch with my friend. Eugene was in the lounge on his laptop when I walked in.
Me:” babe I am gonna go have that lunch with Vhusani”
Eugene:” I was hoping for a last minutes invite” he stopped what he was doing on his laptop and looked at me
Me:”no forget it, it’s not happening” he rolled his eyes
Eugene:” ok then” he acted like he was angry
Me:” can I ask for a favour?”
Eugene:” ok”
Me:” can I drive the Ferrari? Last time I checked it was in Joburg but I saw it out there this morning”
Eugene:” yeah I got someone to bring it back”
Me:” so can i?” I was not sure if he was going to let me drive it…he smiled
Eugene:” what’s mine is yours cupcake”
Me:” yeyyyyyy!” I danced a bit…he raised an eyebrow looking at me with half a smile
Eugene:” I didn’t know you love cars this much…so after I have asked you to move in remind me to show you all my cars” I raised my eyebrows
Me:” all your cars?”
Eugene:” you didn’t think that the Rover and the Ferrari is all I got did you? Madam you are up for a big surprise” he smiled and started typing on his laptop…I smiled shaking my head…how many cars did he have?
Me:” where are the car keys?”
Eugene:” check in the kitchen drawers….i am sure Lusani put them somewhere there”
Me:” Lusani?”
Eugene:” one of my guys…you’ll meet him soon” I shook my head immediately
Me:” I don’t think I want to meet him”
Eugene:” be my guest then”
Me:” babe after my lunch with Vhusi I will go to Ria’s house…I haven’t been there since….i don’t even know since when so I wanna check if I should get a cleaning company to clean the house and after that I can decide if I should rent the house out….i am definitely not selling it and I am also not moving in there”
Eugene:” ok cool my love, I will be working from home” I walked to the kitchen and searched for the car keys. I got the keys and kissed him goodbye and left. Driving in Eugene’s Ferrari felt like heaven…it was the best feeling in the world.
I got to the restaurant where I was to meet Vhusani and parked the car and walked in. She wasn’t there when I walked in so I chose a table and ordered the food so long. I didn’t blame her for running a bit late because she was coming from work. I was sitting on my table when someone walked to the table and stood there. I looked up and found Jake staring at me with a smile. Owww my word Jake
Me:“Jake?” I couldn’t believe it. I got up and gave him a long warm hug
Me:”wow I can’t believe my eyes”
Jake:” you better believe them” he looked good shame….Jake has always been hot
Jake:” uhm…I am sorry about…Ria”
Me:” it’s cool but thanks anyway”
Jake:” so how have you been?”
Me:” well I have been great as you can see”
Jake:” yeah I can see…you are even glowing, you seem happy” I giggled
Me:” you don’t look bad yourself…how is work? So you got a…uhm a new boss now?”
Jake:” yeah I kinda miss you in that office though….we miss Ria too, I mean he was great at his job” I looked away rubbing my nose with my finger
Jake:” uhm I am sorry for mentioning him ok?”
Me:” it’s cool Jake”
Jake:” I see you have a ring” he said with a smile…I looked at my ring and smiled
Me:” I met someone yeah”
Jake:” ow…that someone should have been me” he looked serious
Me:” and get your wife to beat me? No thank you bro” he laughed. I chose to make a joke out of that statement because I didn’t want him to talk further about me and him. I mean me and Jake? Well Eugene would kill us both and that’s a fact
Jake:” things are not working out between us”
Me:” oww I am sorry”
Jake:” you haven’t changed your number have you?” I shook my head
Jake:”ok I will stay in contact then…I gotta ran…it was nice seeing you”
Me:” likewise”
After Jake left Vhusani finally arrived and we had our lunch talking and laughing. It was nice spending time with her too. After an hour then we parted ways as she had to go back to work.
I then drove to Rialivhuwa’s house. My heart was beating out of its place…I was a bit nervous about going there but I knew I had to do this. I needed to see the condition that the house was in and then I could make a decision on when to get the cleaning company to come scrap it up so that it could look as good as new. Maybe I can also get it painted again? Yeah maybe I should hey. I got to the gate and got the shock of my life when I realised that the gate was open. Ok what the hell was happening? I had the keys with me and didn’t expect it to be open. When that Karabo girl left the funeral she handed me the house keys. I parked my car out the gate and moved closer to the gate…I looked around and to be honest….it didn’t look like a house that’s been unoccupied for two months…it looked like there was a car coming in and out regularly. I walked in and I could hear soft music playing inside the house and the windows were also opened. Tjoo I ran out as quickly as I could. I got inside my car and drove my car few houses from Ria’s house and parked it on the street. I then called Eugene
Eugene:” yeah”
Me:” babe there is someone at Ria’s house”
Eugene:” huh?”
Me:” yeah please can you come? I can’t walk in there by myself….i don’t even know who is inside but someone is definitely inside”
Eugene:” ok I am coming there right now”
Life as we know it
Insert 114
So I patiently waited for Eugene. After 15 minutes tops I saw his car parking at Ria’s gate and I drove back there too. I got out of the car and went to him. He got out of the car too
Eugene:” did you open the gate?” he asked holding my hand
Me:” no it was like this when I came” I was really scared
Eugene:” you are really shaken up….do you wanna come with me or should I do this alone? I really don’t mind doing this on my own”
Me:” no I am coming with”
Eugene:” ok let’s do this” we walked inside the yard with our hands on each other. We got to the front door and Eugene took out his gun. For the first time in my relationship with him I was actually glad that he had a gun with.
Eugene:” you’re gonna walk in behind me ok? I will walk in first and see what’s happening in there” he whispered. I nodded as my body started to tremble. He opened the door and walked in….he went quiet for a while so I followed and walked inside the house. The hell is happening here? I was seriously shocked…Eugene gave me a questioning look putting his gun away
Me:” what the hell are you doing here?” I said putting both my hands on my waist, I was actually pissed….why the hell was she here? And the heart attack I almost suffered because of her? Dammit I felt like suing her damn ass. She was chilling in the living room playing music while on her phone
Karabo:” uhm…”
Eugene:” you know her?” he was almost whispering
Me:” yeah, it’s Ria’s girlfriend”
Eugene:” oww I see….i think I will wait for you outside then” he looked a bit disappointed
Me:” ok babe” Eugene walked out and I looked at Karabo waiting for answers
Me:” I asked you a question…what are you doing in my house?”
Karabo:” I am sorry but technically its Ria’s house it’s just that he left it in your names” I laughed at her stupidity…so her dead boyfriend didn’t tell her that my money actually paid for more than half of what we owned?
Me:” not that I owe you an explanation but this house was rightfully mine…we used my money to buy this house. Ria was not making enough cash to buy a house when we bought it so this is rightfully mine and when he left it for me…he knew it was the right thing to do” she just looked at me and blinked
Me:” and when we divorced I gave him the house because I didn’t need it and I could afford to buy another one…so back to the question, what are you doing here?”
Karabo:” uhm…after the funeral I was seriously hurt” I walked to the lounge and sat opposite her
Me:” so was I”
Karabo:” I was not married to him or anything but I came to the house after the funeral just to clean up the house and pick up the rest of my stuff. I decided to stay the night crying myself to sleep and I spent the following night and the night after that…until now” I raised an eyebrow
Me:” but you gave me the keys”
Karabo:” I had spare keys with me”
Me:” you do realise that you have to leave right?”
Karabo:” yes I do…like you said it’s your house, he left it for you…but can I stay a little bit longer please” seriously? Why in a world would I let her stay in this house after finding out that she’s been staying here without anyone’s knowledge…
Me:” pardon? Why would I do that?” was she kidding me?
Karabo:” please give me few weeks to look for a place to stay”
Me:” where were you staying before moving in with him?” I don’t even know why I was doing this with her because all I had to do was get her out of my house
Karabo:” I was renting out a flat but he asked me to move in so I have nowhere else to go right now and i have to report for work this evening” I raised an eyebrow
Karabo:” I work at a night club” mhm that’s where they met then…why was Ria dating a girl working in a club and go as far as moving in with her? Well I guess he really liked her
Me:” ow”
Karabo:” yeah i know it’s not ideal but it pays the bills”
Me:” but you aren’t paying the bills here” she gave me a fake laugh
Karabo:” I have a family to take care of you know….mom is sick and not working so I have siblings to support financially…staying here was really helping….before I moved in here i used to share a flat but I was paying way too much still” ok I actually started feeling sorry for her. I mean all my life I never had to struggle…I never had to work to support my family…money has always been there so hearing someone talking about supporting siblings with their little salary made me feel sorry for her
Me:” I am sorry” I said feeling genuinely sorry for her
Karabo:”it’s nothing to be sorry about…its life” I looked away not knowing what to say next….i was not sure if sending her packing was a good idea anymore. I mean I didn’t want to stay in the house myself and I definitely didn’t want to sell it…I also didn’t need the rental money for the house, the only reason why I wanted to rent it out was that I wanted it to be occupied
Me:” uhm you can stay for now Karabo” I said not looking at her and standing up
Karabo:” really? Thank you” she ran to me and gave me a hug. Now I wished Ria had left her with something, maybe 5000 grand at least. I couldn’t believe that I was actually letting her stay but what was I to do? I was not going to be heartless and turn a blind eye and just pretend like I didn’t know that the poor girl needed my help.
Me:” it’s not permanent though…just a couple of months ok?”
Karabo:” definitely”
Me:” I will come by maybe on the weekend and we can discuss your living arrangement…maybe I can even get my lawyer to set up a lease for us” she smiled
Karabo:” anything that makes you comfortable then I am game”
Me:” ok, see you later then” I walked to the door
Karabo:”Andani”
Me:”yes” I turned around to look at her
Karabo:” thank you…you are not as bad as I thought you were after all” I smiled
Me:” I am not heartless….you need this house more than I do” she smiled
I walked out of the house and back to Eugene. I was not sure if what I did was the right thing or if it was going to come back and bite me but it felt right. I couldn’t just send her packing as if I needed to move in. Plus she was Rialivhuwa’s girlfriend, it’s not like she was a total stranger. I walked out the gate and found Eugene waiting for me by the car.
Eugene:” how did it go?”
Me:” I am letting her stay” I said while I was standing in front of him. He frowned as if he didn’t understand why I’d do such a thing
Eugene:” why? You didn’t even know she was staying here”
Me:” yeah I know but she needs a place to stay and it’s not like I need the house…she will be keeping it clean in the meantime”
Eugene:” it’s your call babe but I don’t know how you can just trust someone so easily…so she’s been staying here since the funeral?”
Me:” yeah…she needs it G….she works at a club and she has a family to take care of…her mom and siblings so helping here won’t kill me. She is not even my enemy, it’s not like she took Ria from me”
Eugene:” ok if you think so…anyway, I am gonna go to the shops for about 30 minutes….i will get you at the house ok?” I wanted to say I am coming with but hey I didn’t want to look like I was just keeping tabs on him so I drove home and Eugene drove to the mall.
I got to his house and parked the car and walked in. I looked around and thought about what he said regarding us moving in together. Was it a good idea? We’ve been acting like we are staying together for a while though and everything has been cool up to so far. I felt a bit uneasy about the idea of moving in, I mean once I move in there was no going back. Look at Vhusani and Lala, they haven’t moved in together yet and they are just as crazy about each other as we are. What if moving in together changes things….i don’t want to be around Eugene 24/7. He has a lot going on in his life and its better with me not around all the time. I didn’t wanna stress every time he tells me he is going out at night and when he disappears for days. If I am staying with him all these things will worry me but if I am away then I won’t even know if he is up all night doing his business…I thought about all this and sighed as walked to the lounge. I switched on the TV and just browsed through the channels… I missed him already, I smiled at the thought….maybe I should move in…or maybe not.
I decided to call Vhusani. I know I was with her less than an hour ago but I needed a bit of her advice
Vhusani:” hey you’re home already?”
Me:” yep I am home….uhm what do you think about moving in together?”
Vhusani:” ow…so you wanna move in with Eugene?”
Me:” I don’t know…he is the one who wants to move in with me”
Vhusani:” so he asked?”
Me:” sort of…don’t you think it will change things between us? What if he starts treating me like a wife and next thing you know there is another woman” was that possible though? Could Eugene cheat on me? After everything we’ve been through, would he cheat on me? Well sometimes men don’t cheat because they don’t love their women so you never know
Vhusani:” I don’t see anything wrong, I mean one day you’ll get married and if things don’t work out now then it means they were not gonna work out even after marriage. Eugene is not Rialivhuwa…don’t expect him to fail ok? He won’t do to you what Ria did to you”
Me:” thank you” I smiled
Vhusani:” I am telling you, if Lala was to ask me to move in I wouldn’t even think twice…I am a grown woman, it’s just a pity that he hasn’t ask”
Me:” thanks friend….i will take your advice into consideration ok? Let me not hold you up…continue with your work”
Vhusani:” ok bye”
After my call with Vhusani I sat down and continued watching TV. Eugene walked in holding a little plastic bag
Me:” you didn’t take long” I said not looking at him
Eugene:” yeah I just needed few things” I wanted to ask what few things but I chose not to ask. He came in front of me and went down on one knee. I looked at him astonished…what the hell was he doing? He had already asked me to marry him so what was this?
Eugene:” Andani…I am humbly and whole heartedly asking you to please make me the happiest man again and move in with me. I Eugene promise to put the toilet seat down, wipe the toilet seat, make you breakfast every now and again, come home on time, tell you about my whereabouts, help you buy groceries, help you with all the house chores, to welcome all your friends and not to change on you” he said all that and took out one box that must have been the size of a watch box. He handed the box to me and I opened and found a bunch of keys inside. I raised an eyebrow
Eugene:” these are keys and gate remotes for all my houses…there is this house, my business house here in Cape Town and The Joburg house…I am sure as time goes by you’ll figure out which remote is for which house” I looked at him and smiled
Me:” now you’ve officially asked” he smiled
Eugene:” do I get a yes?” he was still on one knee. I got up and took his hand, he got up too and looked down on me. I took his hand into mine
Me:” are you sure I am not going to get in the way of your business? Eugene you haven’t stayed with a woman and run your business at the same time…are you sure it’s going to work?”
Eugene:” it will, I am sure about that”
Me:” so I won’t get in the way?”
Eugene:” not at all”
Me:” if I say I am not nervous I will be lying. I don’t want things to change between us, do you promise that we will always love each other? And that you will do all the things you mentioned up there? I don’t want to see guns lying around Eugene, I don’t want your guys here…I’ve seen what happens to women who marry men like you, can I please be an exception? I don’t want you to change me, to make me into a female version of you, please make sure I stay out of it”
Eugene:” I promise cupcake” I smiled
Me:” then I am moving in” he smiled and hugged me. We were about to take a very big step in our relationship and I hoped that it was going to work on our favour. I was still a little bit on edge…I was scared of finding out things about Eugene that could make me change my mind about him….maybe there is nothing else to know about him…maybe I know everything and maybe….maybe this is finally my happy ending….i thought as I was in his arms.
Life as we know it
Insert 115
The following morning when I woke up the first thing I heard was him talking on the phone. I pretended to be sleeping and didn’t move one inch. He wasn’t in bed so he was standing somewhere in the room.
Eugene:” yes I said check it out….yeah check out her everything, if I find out that this Doctor is playing me then all hell will break lose….nahh its something personal but I want you to look closely on who she talks to everyday and what she is saying…update me if anything suspicious pop up…..i will hear from you” he finished talking and I opened my eyes and turned to look at him. He was standing there with his jean on and topless.
Eugene:” you’re up” he smiled waling to me and gave me a kiss
Me:” and you are already working…sorry to ask but is this about the Doctor?” he nodded
Eugene:” I can’t risk anything Andi, I need to be extra careful to see if she is not playing me. But I did tell her that if she plays me then I’ll punish her accordingly” I raised an eyebrow
Eugene:” no I am not going into details…let’s just hope she is legit, let’s hope she don’t sell me out. I told her to let me know immediately if anyone approaches her regarding me so let’s hope no one approaches her or if they do…then let’s hope she let me know”
Me:” I don’t think you should worry about this though….Doctors don’t talk about their patients”
Eugene:” until the Patient is Eugene” I laughed
Me:” you are a special case neh?” he smiled
Eugene:” yeah…what time do we leave?” we planned on going to my house to pack up everything that I needed to take. It was just going to be my clothes, my beddings (no offence but my Eugene didn’t have enough bedding to excite me”, few décor items and I think that’s it. the rest of the stuff we can always buy.
Me:” let me wake up and freshen up” I got out of bed
Me:” do you think I should rent my house out?”
Eugene:” I’d say sell it”
Me:” what?” no ways
Eugene:” are you looking into going back?”
Me:” no…well…maybe…well no but…babe we are not married yet” he laughed…what was funny
Eugene:” so you are afraid I’d kick you out?” I laughed
Me:” if anything, I will be the one kicking you out” we laughed.
Eugene:” so tomorrow I am going up to Joburg” I stopped walking as I was walking to the bathroom
Me:” ow? What’s happening in Joburg?”
Eugene:” its Thursday remember? The Doctor?”
Me:” ow you are having a session…what time?”
Eugene:” at 11 so if you have no other plans then we can go together…you can be there for moral support” I smiled
Me:” ok my baby I am coming with you”
Eugene:” and we van have lunch with my sisters at 13:00 neh?”
Me:” cool”
Eugene:” I am booking flight for 7:15 tomorrow morning and we will fly back at 15:05”
Me:” sure thing”
So we spent the whole day packing my stuff and coming back to his house with them and we had to pack the stuff again. I had to make enough space for all my clothes.
Eugene:” it’s the first time I am doing this” he was helping me hang my dresses in the closet
Me:” hanging clothes?”
Eugene:” no…sharing everything with someone….sharing my closet like this…this feels real” he was smiling
Me:” that’s because it’s real” we looked at each other and smiled.
By the end of the day all my clothes were in the closet…I even changed the bedding and the curtains…Eugene kept on smiling, he didn’t mind me making changes…I think he was just happy to have me in his house. I also brought my bedroom couch…I loved that couch so I couldn’t leave it in my house. I also brought few drawings which we hung in the living room. We brought new curtains for the whole house…I wanted to feel at home and I wanted the house to have my touch in it you know. I didn’t want to feel like a guest who couldn’t change anything. I was happy with the kitchen, everything looked perfect there. As for the lounge…everything looked fine too so I decided not to change anything else. By the end of the day we were dead tired so we just bought takeaways for dinner.
The following morning Eugene and I woke up and prepared ourselves…Eugene had already booked the flight tickets online. We drove to the airport and boarded the flight. We got to OR Tambo and rented a car. We then drove to his house. We got there 30 minutes before 11. So we waited for the Doctor to finally arrive. Eugene seemed a bit edgy
Me:” it’s gonna be fine babe” we were sitting in the lounge on one couch with Eugene’s hand around me
Eugene:” its…it’s not easy to talk you know”
Me:” it’s gonna be fine babe…remember why you are doing this, you want to be better” he gave me a faint smile
Eugene:’ thank you for being here”
Me:” anything for my big baby” the Doctor rang a bell and Eugene opened for her. The Doctor came in and we led her to the office. We got there and Eugene asked me to check if she was not bugged
Me:” pardon?”
Eugene:” yeah please do…she is leaving her bag outside and please just run your hands through her body just to make sure that I am safe”
Doc:” just do it already…I understand why he feels this way” she put her hand bag down and I went to her and ran my hands all over her body
Me:” she is not bugged”
Eugene:” cool then…just put her handbag outside as you leave” I walked out of the door with her handbag and took it with me to the lounge.
BACK IN THE OFFICE
Doc:” thanks for this session again Eugene and I totally understand why you don’t feel safe talking to me…its completely normal for someone who has been through so much”
Me:” I am glad we are on the same page…I guess I don’t have to remind you of what’s at stake in case you talk” the Doctor smiled
Doc:” my whole family get slaughtered while I watch….i know”
Me:” now we can start” he sat on the chair and relaxed looking at the Doctor. Infront of her was the note book she used last time and a pen
Doc:” so after our last session…did anything change? How did it felt like?” she took the pen and got ready to write looking at Eugene
Eugene:” well it was strange….i don’t feel any change as yet”
Doc:” I thought as much, it’s only been one session. Although I didn’t have any notes with me…I was able to research about your behaviour…the addiction you told me about”
Me:’ ow?”
Doc:” yes and it’s not really an addiction…it’s a sickness…uhm you are suffering fro-“
Eugene:” stop…stop right there, I know what this is…you’re gonna come up with some fancy scientific word saying I have been diagnosed with whatever the f*** word you’re gonna use but I am not sick….i am addicted that’s all, the only sickness I have is that I am addicted that’s all…I know how white people want to diagnose everything and make it into a damn sickness” he was now pissed
Doc:” ok…ok Eugene I get it…we are not diagnosing you then…we will treat it as an addiction”
Eugene:” thank you”
Doc:” uhm another thing is that there is a speciality Doctors who deals with people with such conditions, the same condition that you have”
Me:” I thought you just said I am not diagnosed with anything…plus I am not talking to another Doctor, you are my Doctor and I want to talk to only you” she nodded and then swallowed
Doc:” ok Eugene…lets continue then…tell me about the triggers…last week you said that men that abuse their families triggers your addiction and that your fiancée helps you cope…have you been close to any trigger since you met her?”
Eugene:” no….i stopped hunting them”
Doc:” so you used to go out looking for them?”
Eugene:” yes”
Doc:” where?”
Eugene:’ Police files…Hospital’s files”
Doc:” I see…I will give you a homework today after the session….i might even have to email it to you so that you don’t forget but since you don’t want anything that could be used as evidence then I will just write them down…but one of the things you should do as your homework is that you must search for something that can replace this addiction…something that’s not bad, something that you can do instead of torturing these people…we call them coping mechanisms”
Eugene:” but Andani is my coping mechanism”
Doc:” yes you said that last time but she is a human being Eugene…you need something like a sport, a game, writing, drawing, working…I mean anything else other than her”
Eugene:” so she is not good enough to be my coping mechanism?” the Doctor smiled
Doc:” it’s not that…she is a human being and she is ought to make mistakes every now and again…what happens when she makes you angry? What happens when you fight? Don’t you think you’ll relapse so hard? I mean your only coping mechanism will be gone….the moment you fight then you won’t have anything holding you back”
Me:” we will fight like normal couples but that won’t make me relapse, it’s not like we will break up”
Doc:’ but what if you do break up” Eugene sat up straight and looked straight ahead and breathed and then grinded his teeth
Me:” we won’t”
Doc:” Eugene don’t you think you should have a little room for disappointment?”
Me:” she will never leave me” he said feeling the pain that he knew he didn’t want to feel. The pain of Andani telling him that she don’t want him anymore. That would obviously kill him and as for relapsing…he would obviously go on a serious killing spree
Doc:” Eugene”
Eugene:” She can’t…i…I can’t cope without her” he said wiping off tears
Doc:” I know and that’s why I want to help you find other ways to cope”
Eugene:” could there be other ways other than her?”
Doc:” yes and I will help you find them…so I want you to spend the whole week thinking about the possible ones and then we will come back here and discuss them…we can take it from there”
Eugene:”ok I will try”
No comments:
Post a Comment